single parenthood

Back in December of 2005

2007-04-02T18:41:00.000-05:00

Back in December of 2005, I posted about Frank and Vida, my mom's parents. I talked about the kind and gentle grandfather that had passed away some 12 1/2 years ago. Yesterday we lost Vida. My 94 year old spunky, independent until her last day, grandma fell down her stairs backwards, and hit her head on a shelf. My aunt had just arrived an hour before to spend a few days with her and saw it happen. She did respond to her telling her she was fine but her chest and shoulder hurt. My aunt called the ambulance and when she went back to Grandma she was having a hard time breathing, one eye was full of blood and she started throwing up. She made it to the hospital 25 miles away, but couldn't keep up the fight. It was fast and to the point, very much like her personality. She never wanted to leave her home for assisted living, she never wanted to suffer, and we thank God for that tonight. But to know she was always there was so comforting. My heart bleeds tonight as I lost my last grandparent and I truly feel the last tie to my mother.

Then I start to realilze Grandma is happier today then she was yesterday when she woke up. She is home with my mom, grandpa and aunt Mary. Life in northern MN will never be the same. I will miss our talks to the most. All of the Great-children, where talking last night, about how she made the best strudel, potica, chocolate chip cookies, blueberry and raspberry pie of anyone they knew. She baked and cooked until the end.

GOD BLESS YOU, GRANDMA. You will remain in our hearts forever.......

Life Is Good

2007-03-27T21:45:00.000-05:00

We have had a wonderful time in my family during the last two weeks. My brother's basketball team, who has been very good this last year, went to the state tournament. Last Thursday, one of his players made a last second three point shot that won the game for his team. It put them into the state finals. On Saturday, the boys came through. They won the state tournament. I was so proud of the entire team.

One of the players, is a senior, and Kiran's former daycare brother. For the first three years Kiran went to Lyle's and Lyle is a father to one of the players. Nate is the greatest kid. He is happy all the time, always has a minute to pick up "little girl", give her a hug and chat with her. This happens even if there are older girls around or no one else. Kiran just loves the entire family. Let me also say that they loved her like a member of their family. I have been so lucky to have had two wonderful daycare providers......Kiran is so loved by many people.

I love Nate and part of me feels that we will never see this family again. Basketball is over, Nate will be graduating in a few months and they don't have any more boys. I feel a loss here and am not sure why. I AM PROUD OF THE STA Cadets. They did one heck of job and I have never seen a team work so well together. According to their coach, this might have been the first season in twenty years that he hasn't seen any no fighting or jealousy between the players.

My dad is feeling better, he even made it down for the first two games in state. I have two more days left with my kids until spring break. Since my two wild ones have moved I LOVE THIS GROUP again.

Kiran and I are taking a couple of nights and going to a water park in Duluth, MN. My nephew, niece, cousin and her two children are joining us. I am so looking forward to getting away and relaxing for a few days.

CONGRATULATIONS TO THE ST. THOMAS CADETS AGAIN. It was a wonderful ride. Thanks for the memories.

Mary

Snow fun

2007-03-04T12:17:00.000-06:00

It was only 8 days ago and we didn't have a flake of snow on the ground. That has all changed in these parts. Last weekend we had 10-12 inches of fresh snow to play in. Then on Thursday we had 15 more inches and a lovely snow day on Friday. I just love snowdays.........

The unexpected three day weekend has been lovely. Friday we spent at home with all the snow coming down and then on Saturday we ventured out to my Brother's basketball game, Kiran played outside in the snow with my nieces, and we made cupcakes. Now doesn't all that sound so exciting. I have to say that my life may seem boring to most single people but I am loving every minute of it. Today Kiran is going to my brother's to slide and play in the snow so more.

During my ride home on Thursday, I did something to my back and it HURTS!!! I have had a hard time getting out of bed and walking around. Lord, this getting old is for the birds. I am hoping when I go to work tomorrow that everything will be better.

Hopefully pictures to follow this week....

Miss everyone,

Mary and Kiran

Happy Valentine's Day

2007-02-14T21:17:00.000-06:00

Last year at this time, I was so happy in all areas of my life. I had, what I thought was a wonderful man in my life. I reached this day with some amount a dread. I was back to the old ways of Valentine's Day, no special person to spend the day or evening with. That was until I realized I had the best in my house already.

We had a wonderful day. It started out this morning, with Kiran giving me her special project she made in school yesterday. It was 6 huge chocolate covered strawberries. Yes, she did keep them in the refrigerator. She then apologized for not making me a card. After I ate the first strawberry, she looked at me and said, "Mommy, is that going to cost you points?" Ok, the kid knows I am on Weight Watchers again. She was concerned that she was adding on to my day that I had planned out last night. Of course these points are free I told her.

The day at school was wild but fun. I really do love my class.

Then, this evening we spent over an hour just talking in her room, snuggling, and reading stories. She read me two books and read her 4. She is so proud of herself when she can read a book to me. It is so amazing watching her sound out words. I watch her and almost cry. Who needs a boyfriend? I am so happy with what I have.....

PS-Al Franken announced he is running for Paul Wellstone's senate seat. I wish him all the luck in the world. It is time to get Norm Coleman out of that chamber.

The 21st century..

2007-01-29T20:39:00.000-06:00

It only took me until now to get high speed internet. I have to say, life is much faster around these parts.......I am so happy I made the decision to finally have it installed. It also comes along with digital cable and many more channels for us to choose from. Ok, Kiran watches one, Disney both morning and night. I tend to watch a few, CSPAN, CNN, CSPANII, ESPN, Comedy Network, some local channels, and ok, I will admit, the SOAP Channel......

I think I mentioned that I had a new student enter my room the week before Winter Break. This child is HELL on wheels. Last week, he brought to school and almost naked picture of some woman and a condom. Yes, you heard me correctly, the kid is in second grade. It is so sad when I look at him and realize what his future has in store. He is a smart child who has been dealt a few terrible hands in his short 7 years. His birthmother no longer has rights to him, his aunt is in the process of adopting him and he told me that he spent the entire weekend standing in the corner. The sad thing is I believe him. I am at a point where I feel sorry for him but he is soooo disruptive in the classroom. There are so many children out there in these types of situations. Please keep all of our children in your prayers.

I have my second conference in Kindergarten on Thursday. Tonight Kiran brought home her mid-trimester report with no concerns in all areas. She is starting to read, if I have mentioned that, I am sorry. Let me add it is in no way because her mommy is a teacher, she finds it easier to read to my SIL or nieces. I guess she is looking at my critical eye.

It was great hearing from everyone.

Mary

Who is now on the fast end of life will be checking in more often, hopefully......

Winter Fun

2007-01-20T13:25:00.000-06:00

She may be from India but she sure loves everything about the snow. Wish me luck, tomorrow I am taking her skating for the first time. I haven't been on a pair of skates in 30 years.

She experienced her first teasing at school this week. On Thursday, she wanted to wear a bindi to school. It matched her outfit and she looks so cute with one on. It seems that ALL the boys made fun of it so she took it off and said it was the last time she would wear one. It made me sad that she is thinking that way but I am sure she will change her mind one of these days.

Sorry, I haven't been around much. Life is just so busy and then there is that other website.....

Hope all is well with everyone.

Webkinz anonymous

2007-01-05T12:03:00.000-06:00

I am starting a new support group for all the parents out there addicted to their childs Webkinz site. This mom needs one. Whenever I get a free a few minutes, you can find me at the computer. Kiran gave me one for Christmas so I play on my own site know. I just love the games on there. So many are educational and it actually makes them responsible for spending and making money. Good lessons on saving and such. If you would like to join the group please email me.....

Today is the official last day of my vacation. I am really rested, have been sleeping until 9:00 every morning and playing on the da-- computer until 2:00 am every night. It has been fun being a stay at home with Kiran. I have had to bring her into school everyday and today I am going in to read a story to her class. She really likes having her mommy at school.

I was going to catch up on my reading over my break, no such luck. I haven't been in the mood to pick up a book for while. I do believe I go through this phase every year. I am hosting bookclub in a week, anyone have any good ideas on books that we could read?

This mom is ready to go back to work on Monday. I actually miss my little turkeys.

HAPPY NEW YEAR!!!

2006-12-31T16:20:00.000-06:00

As I reflect on this past year, I can only say I am happy and sad it is coming to a close.

Kiran remains the delight of my life. She has a sense of humor that keeps popping up. The other day, we were joking around when she said you cannot boss me. I replied, "That is my job as your mother." She looked at me and responded, "Sefali Bibi, is the boss of me." I can say, I am happy that reply came the first time during a joking situation instead of one when she was angry with me. Then the other day, I asked her a question, her reply, "No, Mary Poppins." My niece almost wet her pants. I have to say I thought it was funny myself.

In the past year, I have watched my father's health decline. His lupus is out of remission, he developed a cause of nasty shingles the week before we celebrated Christmas and due to the fact he did eat or drink anything for almost a week, ended up spending Christmas in the hospital. He had some very serious signs of short term memory loss while in the hospital. The doctors feel it was due to the pain killer, being dehydrated, and not eating. A week later, he is still getting confused but not so much and said he feels almost normal. Please say a prayer that it was nothing more the meds. He will see a neurologist on the 8th of January.

It was a good year for the Democrats. I can only hope that changes start to happen in Washington quickly. We are also happy in MN, the governor has lost much of his power with both the house and senate being of a democrat majority. It is funny listening to both the President and palmetto talking about compromise and working with the other side of the aisle.

Thank you for being friends and of great support in the last year. There have been many times that I felt this is the only place I can vent.

Happy New Year ALL!!!

Flip

2006-12-21T18:14:00.000-06:00

Ok, so we haven't had any weather to speak of for months. Today it rained and then snowed. This only concerns me because we are suppose to get 1 to 3 inches of snow tomorrow which will just enough to screw with the roads. Kiran and I were to leave for northern MN tomorrow after school. It is about a 3 1/2 hour drive so I am hoping the weather forecaster continue on their streak of being wrong.

She is so excited for the x-mas festivities to start. Christmas is so much fun having a little one around. She has asked Santa for a microscope and the 4th season of Full House on DVD. She is getting both and that is all. From her mommy she is getting the first four Ramona Quimby books.

From her daycare provider she received her 3rd Webkinz today and is so excited. For those who don't know, with these WEbkinz, you build a virtual life for them on the internet. They have a house, furniture, you have to feed them and so on. It is great and I think I am becoming addicted to the games on the site.

If I don't have a chance to stop again before the Christmas, Merry Christmas to those who celebrate, Happy Hanukkah, and Happy Kawanzaa.

We're Dreaming of a White Christmas

2006-12-14T17:39:00.000-06:00

It is December 14th and today I walked out of school without my coat on. The high today was 50 degrees, normal high is 27 degrees F. We have no snow and let me mention we haven't really had a snowfall yet this year. In the last few days, it has rained a little but nothing worth mentioning I guess.

Lake Superior is at it's lowest level ever due to drought conditions. The lakes around the area are dangerous because of all the warm weather. They did freeze at one point but now are opening up again. The tulips are thinking about waking up and the skunks are up.

I keep telling Kiran we will drive around some night and look at the lights once it snows. It might not happen until they are all down.

Is anyone else having just weird, unseasonable weather in their parts?

Life's little lessons....

2006-12-06T19:24:00.000-06:00

Lesson #1

When staying home sick, always bring child to daycare!!!!

Yesterday I had a some nastiness and didn't go to work. I called in sick at 5 am, set the alarm for 7 and called daycare to tell her I would bring Kiran to school in the afternoon. Basically telling her she had a free day. Kiran woke up at 8:15 and asked what day it was. I told her Tuesday and rolled over. She jumped up on me, why aren't we up yet? I told her I was sick and was going back to sleep. It was then that every 15 minutes she woke me up telling me she was BORED!! The kid is six she doesn't get BORED!! That lasted until I finally emerged out of bed at 11 am.

Lesson #2

Never leave your take-out in the reach of six year old when changing clothes!!!

Every Wednesday, after dance class, we get take out. Tonight was my turn to choose the restaurant. We drove through Culver's. Kiran wanted a grilled cheese and I order a blue burger. When we got home, I dashed upstairs to change my clothes. When I went downstairs to eat my burger, I opened it up and Kiran pointed out what looked like a bite mark on the bun. I was looking at it thinking this is the grossest thing I have ever seen. I got out the phone book to call Culver's when Kiran started laughing. It seems she took a little bite out of it and wrapped it right back up.

Lesson #3

Always make sure you have wine in the house after a hard day!!!

Need I say more......

Feed My Starving Children

2006-11-25T08:51:00.000-06:00

In place of Christmas presents this year, my SIL's family has decided to do something for charity. Yesterday, my SIL arranged for several of us to volunteer at this organization. You spend 2 hours packaging food that will feed children in some of the poorest nations.

When you arrive, you see many photos of starving kids with pictures of healthy children right next to them. They are before and after shots of the children. The first thing you do is watch a four minute video of the organization, what they do, and how it helps the children. Once that is over you wash your hands, put on a lovely hairnet, apron and away you go. Each food package contains enough food to feed 6 children a meal.

The video was heartbreaking to see the children in the garage cans, Kiran asked what that meant that they eat trash and in some cases mud. She told me this morning that 16,000 children die everyday because they are hungry. It is so sad that she remembers the figure.

The first thing is a chicken base, next dried veggies with enough vitamins and minerals for the day, then in goes the soy, and last rice. Once that is done, it is sealed, boxed up, and ready to ship. It works like an assembly line with everyone doing their job. Kiran was fabulous. She worked really hard along side her cousin to help the children of the world.

Yesterday the 55 people there, packaged 8,000 meals. That will shipped around the world.

We take everything we have for granted. The feast we had for Thanksgiving was huge and then to think of the dying children it saddens me.

If anyone wants to see their website here is the link http://www.fmsc.org/. The really neat thing is is 94% of their donations go directly to the children and getting the food to them. It is a Minneasota based organization that is starting up a warehouse in Chicago shortly.

Kiran and I have decided we need to do this once a month for the next year.

Love to all..

My SIX YEAR OLD

2006-11-18T21:29:00.000-06:00

This was my girl's day. She had a wonderful time. In this first picture is Hailey, her best friend from school. They were so cute together, holding hands much of the party. It was the sweetest thing.

In this picture with the cake, she is sitting next to Hailey and Noah (my boyfriend). He jumps around, somedays I will be his boyfriend then Kiran will be and even my niece Helayna makes in the picture someday.

Her in one of the outfits I recently had a person buy while they were in India. It was one of three outfits and the total cost for all three was $25. She loved the outfits and wore it the rest of the day. She even asked if she could wear one to school this week. Let's see, this is very thin material and our average temp for this time of the year is 40. She will have to wear a tshirt and tights but why not.

Admire the cake, it was the first cake I have baked as an adult. Kiran loved it but did comment she needed to tell her friends it was ok because my mom is learning to decorate. Nice kid, but she was happy with the final product.

My baby is all grown up. She isn't that little 8 1/2 month old they put in my arms over 5 years ago. She is just my girl.

We did talk last night about her birthmother and how she might be feeling knowing her birthday was coming up. We both said we wondered what she thinks and so on. Thank you Sefali for the gift you gave me.

The real day is Monday.

No Child Left Behind

2006-11-15T19:34:00.000-06:00

Ok, I am borrowing this from a fellow blogger who must of gotten it from some one else because I have seen it in school.

Today, the state department of education released the test scores in all the MN puublic schools, they were terrible. It had to do with the test being much harder and many other factors. Our wonderful Governor, knew what the test results said, because my school knew we where making our goals in September.

This football analogy is wonderful.......

The New Education System ---The Football Version

1. All teams must make the state playoffs and all MUST win the championship. If a team does not win the championship, they will be on probation until they are the champions, and coaches will be held accountable. If after two years they have not won the championship their footballs and equipment will be taken away UNTIL they do win the championship.

2. All kids will be expected to have the same football skills at the same time even if they do not have the same conditions or opportunities to practice on their own. NO exceptions will be made for lack of interest in football, a desire to perform athletically, or genetic abilities or disabilities of themselves or their parents.

ALL KIDS WILL PLAY FOOTBALL AT A PROFICIENT LEVEL!
3. Talented players will be asked to workout on their own, without instruction. This is because the coaches will be using all their instructional time with the athletes who aren't interested in football, have limited athletic ability or whose parents don't like football.

4. Games will be played year round, but statistics will only be kept in the 4th, 8th, and 11th game.

It will create a New Age of Sports where every school is expected to have the same level of talent and all teams will reach the same minimum goals. If no child gets ahead, then no child gets left behind!
I just love the world of education. I am all for being accountable for my kids learning but we all play at different levels in life.

Life in MN is quiet and wonderful. We are planning a big birthday party for Saturday afternoon. I cannot believe that my girl is going to be six already.

The Election and Congressman Oberstar

2006-11-09T18:13:00.000-06:00

It has been over 48 hours since the polls have closed and the Democrats have done one hell of a job.

I heard yesterday, that over 1/3 of the christian right vote, went to Democrats. Are they getting smarter or what???

On Monday night I had a great conversation with my dad. My dad is old school, still votes Democratic, but is pro-life, as was my mother. When we were talking I asked how can anyone be pro-life and be for the war???? Aren't both of them killing....(BTW- My dad is against both.)

His response was that 2 wrongs don't make a right. The 8th district Congressman from MN is is James Oberstar (the region I grew up in and my dad still lives in.) He might be the third most senior Congressman in the House. He will be the chair of the transportation committee. Go Jim!! When we were talking he did remind me that Jim was pro-life and has never waivered. I cannot agree with the pro-life people but I don't think I could have an abortion either. Then I told my dad that if Kiran comes home at 15 and I cannot tell you that I wouldn't suggest it.

The thing about Jim is, I believe his stance on that one issue, made him a regional candidate and not senate material for MN. He would have made one hell of a senator. I have to add that I love that man. The last time I saw him was in Washington DC several years ago. The state teacher's union was giving him an award for voting 100% with education and labor and we were to give him his award and thank him. I told the two people I was with that Jim was an old family friend and how excited I was to see him again. They had attitude whatever....

By the time we walked out of his office we were all in tears. During the entire meeting which was 30 minutes, he talked about how I looked like my mother, what a great family I had, was my grandma still making the best potica in the world, and back to your mom she was a terrific and very special woman who was taken away from us much to early. Two weeks after that, my dad received a letter from Jim, telling him how much he enjoyed seeing me, how proud my dad must be to have raised a beuatiful woman, and how lucky he was that everytime he could look at me and he could see my mom. When we were getting in the elevator, one of my friends looked at and me and said, "WOW, I have never had such an emotional meeting with an elected official before. Your family really does know him."

Talk about a wonderful person and congressman. I thank God that he was re-elected and will see some happier days in the next session....

Minnesota leads the way....

2006-11-07T21:04:00.000-06:00

Today, the 5th district which includes Minneapolis, has elected the first Muslim member of congress. I congratulate Keith on his victory.

We have also elected our first woman to the US Senate. GO AMY!!!

Now it is a wait for the governor's race. After talking to my dad last night, if the right guy gets elected, it might mean big things for one of my brothers. GO MIKE HATCH!!!!

I am so tired of spending hours every week assessing my kids so the damn republicans can show the damn president we are making progress. I need time to teach, time to plan the lessons I am teaching, I don't need to sit in staff development three hours a week after school. Keeping my fingers crossed that it all works out by the end of the night.

Mary

In 52 hours....

2006-11-05T15:52:00.000-06:00

As I post this, in 52 hours the polls will be closed in MN. This incredible negative campaign will be over with, the people will have made their choices. Only time will tell..

Until then, I am climbing under the covers, not turning on the radio or television unless it is Disney and coming up for air on Tuesday evening.

Cross your fingers friends that change is in the wind......

Halloween Eve.....

2006-10-30T19:24:00.000-06:00

Could the anticipation grow anymore around this house??? I don't think so. Tonight we carved pumpkins with my nieces. Kiran came home and tried on her costume one more time before the big day.

She then asked me if I could come and help out at her party. Of course, the little darlings in my room are having a party so the answer would be no, I cannot. My SIL then popped into the conversation and told Kiran she would stop in and see her and then give her a ride home. That made her very excited.

On the political front, everything that goes wrong around our house we have just blame Bill Clinton like the Republicans tend to do. The other day we were in a store when Kiran dropped something. She looked up at me and said, "That was George Bush's fault!" I thought I was going to die laughing. Can you tell which party she would vote for today????

It is hard to believe that 4 years ago, Senator Paul Wellstone, his lovely wife, wonderful daughter and friends died in an airplane crash about 2 miles from my brother's house. They were on their way to a funeral for a friend's dad. Today I was reading in the paper that his last vote on the Senate floor was a NO vote against the war. How right he was.....You still can find many people sporting their bumper Wellstone! bumper stickers around town.

Dare we start getting excited, one week before the election, that something might really change????

Adoption.....

2006-10-25T19:26:00.000-05:00

Today, one of my dearest friends at school, rounded the corner and looked at me and said friend how are you??? I could tell something was up and then she said, "I am going to be a mommy to a little baby boy in the next weeks." I started crying on the spot.

Anne and her husband have been through so much. They have been married for 9 years and having children didn't seem to be in the picture for them. About 2 1/2 years ago, she told me that they had decided to adopt. At first it seemed, like they wanted the Euro-American baby with the perfect birthparents. As time went by, they changed their tune and yesterday they signed the papers to adopt a little boy once he was born. I cannot tell you how excited I am for them. They deserve to be happy and I pray this all works out.

The one thing that makes me sad is the fact that their little boy will know his birthmother. They have agreed to keep in touch and maybe once a year get together. Oh, how my tune has changed. When I adopted Kiran I didn't want anything but a closed adoption. As she gets older and wants to know the information, I wished I had some answers for her. Someday, I hope we can find her and have all of our questions answered. Until then we can only fantasy about what she looks like, what she is doing, and like Kiran said the other night, wonder if she has any brothers or sisters.

Adoption, it is the coolest word we know in our house.

Mondays.......

2006-10-23T18:01:00.000-05:00

We had a wonderful long weekend in Northern Minnesota. We watched deer, a golden eagle and other wildlife. Last night we came home and relaxed some more.

This morning was going like every other Monday, two of my students who had been traveling, one to London and the other to Vegas, were back and it was great to see them. My Vegas traveler brought me a bracelet of dice. It is wonderful. His grandma told me that he picked it out himself. It makes it even that much more special.

Then the bottom dropped out. One of our bilingual aids came up to my room with a few tears in her eyes. She pulled me out into the hallway and told me that one of my students lost her baby sister this weekend. The baby was 2 1/2 months old and she loved that little girl. It sounds like SIDS. I have been so sad all day. She was in school and trying to keep up a good front but I could tell that it was getting to her. She told me that tonight would be the last time she ever gets to see her sister. How sad is that???

It just made everything else seem so trivial in the picture of things. How do you explain to a 7 year old about life not being fair much less to the mother who treasures her children??? In my 19 years of teaching I have never had a student lose anyone that close to them in age.

Hug your little people tonight, for that matter everyone you love, because you just never know what life has in store.

Kindergarten 2006

2006-10-13T19:06:00.000-05:00

To Close for Comfort

2006-10-10T17:07:00.000-05:00

Today, I was walking outside to pick up my wonderful second graders, when we all heard a pop (sounded like a gunshot) followed by some smoke and a scream. The first thing we did was get everyone inside and safe. The noise came from a home across the street from the school. It all turned out alright and with the police investigation it turned out to be some knuckle head letting off fireworks.

Who on this earth, with what has happened in schools the last few weeks, be so stupid???? During conferences this week, I had a parent ask me how safe their children were. I didn't know how to reply because in reality we are sitting ducks. We have no security in the elementary buildings, maybe a camera or two but not much. Our doors stay open during the day in case someone needs to deliver something, pick up a child and so on. We have started locking all but two doors but hey that doesn't make me feel better.

Today I was close to my first school lockdown. Reality has sunk in. Lord help us all and the children we serve.......

One Proud Mommy

2006-10-03T17:55:00.000-05:00

When I picked up my baby this afternoon, she comes running over to me and puts her hand in her bag. "MOMMY, MOMMY, LOOK WHAT I GOT TODAY!!!" The smile was from ear to ear.

She received the Student of the Month award for her classroom. Her teacher wrote on there that she is a good friend to all in class. Well, I was worried about her being to shy and not making any no friends.

Hopefully she will continue on with these awards for a lifetime.

One Proud Mommy

MINNESOTA TWINS!!!!!!!!!!!

2006-10-01T17:23:00.000-05:00

First, let me thank the KC Royals and their swept of the Detriot Tigers this weekend.......

Second, there is no better feeling then supporting a team while they win or lose. I remember back in 1982 the MN Twins lost 102 games and as a senior in high school I could tell you everyone's batting average.

In 1987 we went from worst to first in one year. In 1991 we played the Braves and were given no chance. We won both of those World Series, 1987 being the sweetest of the two.

At the all-star break, my guys were 12 1/2 games out. Everyone was writing them off. In the middle of August they were 10 games out. On October 1st they have a one game lead......

Today, my MN Twins won their division and homefield advantage. We knew we were getting to the playoffs but had the Yankees in the backs of our minds. This is a team who cannot win at Yankee stadium, a team who loves their home. Today with their victory over Chicago, and the loss that Detriot suffered to KC, we became the division champions......

Joe Mauer, a hometown boy who is as Minnesotan as they come, win the batting title over Derek Jetier (SP). Derek maybe the most handsome guy in the Majors but Joe is probably the nicest......

Kirby and my mom are smiling down on us this evening. My mom was the biggest fan I ever knew. Kirby was the best player we ever had.

GO TWINS!!!! WIN THE SERIES!!!

Life in MN

2006-09-24T08:26:00.000-05:00

The campaigning in MN is already turning nasty. I just cannot believe that people can put ads on the radio and tv that attack a person so. In one district, the first
Muslim is about to be elected to Congress. In his youth he didn't have the perfect life and didn't always make the right choices so the press and Republicans are attacking. I don't know much about him and who ever wins that seat is replacing an institution in Martin Sabo and that is one tough act to follow.

For Senator Mark Dayton's seat, the Republican candidate is attacking his opponent in the dumbest ads I have every seen. His ads are even turning off some of his Republican friends. He attacks her because she is a lawyer and we have to many lawyers in the senate already. That is a great reason not to vote for her.

Not much happening in this house. My dad is home and feeling much better. It seems that every flare up he has is getting worse. The last one was 5 years ago, I hope it is another 5 before the next one.

Kiran is still loving school. This week she came home from school all proud with herself because she passed the shoe tying test. She is an official shoe tie helper in her class, I might add one of three.

My class is still wonderful and smart. I laugh with them everyday and it is a pleasure to go to work every morning. I haven't said that in years.

Mary

Stuff (Not a very exciting title)

2006-09-16T15:23:00.000-05:00

Back in 1976, my dad was diagnosed with Lupus. It took the doctors and many visits to several, over 3 months, to come up with what was ailing him because it was not something men got. He recieved treatment for many years before the disease went into remission. He was in remission for over 20 years. Around 5 years ago he had a flair up where he couldn't walk, lift his legs or arms because his joints were so swollen and hurt terribly. This week he had another flair up and as we speak is still in the hospital. Please say a prayer that this is just a flair up and not the disease coming out of remission totally. I remember the days when he couldn't unbutton his pants, cut his own meat, walk up the stairs to bed with out crawling and just the shear pain he was in.

Life around here is progressing along. Kiran started tap and ballet this week. She has lessons one day a week for an hour. She loves to dance. School has been a wonderful experience for her. She loves it!!! She is even excited about her first fundraiser and can hardly wait to go out and sell wrapping paper to our friends.

My class continues to be wonderful. It is such a pleasure to wake up in the morning and dread going to work. They truly are a great group. Work is truly a nice place to be. The funny thing is the children who drove me crazy for 2 longgggg years stop in every morning to say hi.

Mary

The First Day

2006-09-05T16:57:00.000-05:00

My morning was wonderful. I have 17 of the sweetest children. My group seems to be smart, kind, and down right wonderful. (I am knocking on wood as I type!) I had 9 children not show up which is not a shock. So many of the kids move during the summer or change schools. I left my school at 12:30 and headed off to daycare to bring Kiran to her room.

The first photo is of Kiran heading into the school. She was so excited at daycare she came flying towards me when I walked in the door.

This is a picture of Kiran with her teacher. She is the kindest, most gentle teacher I think I have ever met. I am so happy we are in her room. The kids did some activities while the parents were herded off to the gym to listen to the principal, school nurse and president of the PTO. The principal is also wonderful. I swear he was tearing up when he was talking about kids, education, and kindergarten. His reputation is that he goes into Kindergarten everyday just because he loves the little ones.

Tomorrow she gets on the bus by herself and then comes home with my niece.

Mary

First Day Nerves

2006-09-04T19:49:00.000-05:00

Tonight, all across the state of Minnesota, children will have trouble falling asleep in anticipation for the first day of school tomorrow. The same can be said about the teachers. Tonight, I will lay in bed, wondering what my new group will be like, what kids will be returning to my school, what new students have arrived and so on.

When I was a kid, I always had problems falling asleep the night before. I was excited to wear my new clothes, see my old friends, and meet a new teacher. As an adult, I have an even harder time sleeping before the children arrive.

My baby starts kindergarten tomorrow. Her bag is packed with all her supplies, sitting by the garage door. We have outfits picked out for the rest of the week. I will take a half day off in the afternoon to bring her and the parents stay for an hour and then we take our children and leave. The big bus day for her will be on Wednesday. She told me she is nervous about taking the bus but she will be fine.

Pictures to follow tomorrow or Wednesday.

Wish us both luck......

Back to the Grindstone.....

2006-08-28T18:38:00.000-05:00

Well, it finally happened, I had to go back to work this morning. I know, you all are crying for me, because you feel terrible that I just finished a 6 week vacation and most of you have worked through the summer. Anyway, when the alarm went off at 5:00 I hit the snooze button several times. It was hard to drag myself to the shower. I got up, finally at 5:30, started my regular routine but somewhere in there, I forgot to put on my jewelry and make-up. Talk about looking scary today. I have 25 children on my list and everyone who sees the names tell me what a wonderful group I have. That is a relief.

Kiran was a trooper this morning. She slept while I dressed her, woke up in time to put on her seatbelt and fall back to sleep. She woke up when we got to daycare and has been smiling ever since. Her daycare loves her and she loves her daycare provider. Last night she did tell me that she was sad that summer was over and there wouldn't be that many mommy days. Then she asked if we would have next summer and told her we have around 13 more of them together.

I am feeling much better. On Thursday I celebrated the beginning of my 43rd year and it was like a new beginning. Maybe it was knowing I was starting back into my routine and wouldn't have so much time to think.

In the last two days, I started Weight Watchers again. Eating right and drinking my water also helps with my moods, that is for sure. It is a balmy 68 degrees outside and it is starting to feel like fall. Another reason to smile.

Thanks to everyone and their kind words. They really do help.

Luv ya,

Meet Sally and Scruffy

2006-08-22T16:38:00.000-05:00

We are having a rough couple of days in these parts. Kiran has been throwing at least two good tantrums, in public mind you, every day. It wasn't until today I realized that she does this every summer. My guess is that with me going back to work on Monday, her starting daycare again and kindergarten, she is feeling the pressure. She still looks so sweet and snuggable when she is sleeping.

Her friends are Sally, the elephant, and Scruffy the puppy. She has been falling asleep in her own bed but I awake everynight sleeping next to her in my bed. When she comes in she brings a pillow, her animals and milk. That is a lot to move in my book every night.

Life for me, is ok, but I just feel so lonely. I know that everyone here cares, my family has no clue that I am feeling like this, and I have great friends but don't want to burden them with my problems. When I try to talk to my SIL, I feel like she doesn't want to hear it and she reminds that life in other parts of the world are much worse. Yes they are, but that doesn't help me at this moment.

I am trying to transition without having Gill around. He is still calling every other day but I talk to him with indifference now. It is nice to hear his voice when he calls. He still wants to see me and spend time with me but why???

Only three actual vacation days left.....

ANTICIPATION.......

2006-08-13T10:13:00.000-05:00

I am going to be so relieved when I go back to work in two weeks. This summer isn't up there with one of the best. I had such high hopes in May that this might be one of the best, it never materialized that way.

Kiran starts kindergarten, we think we got the teacher we wanted but will find out for sure next week. She really has changed in the past few months. The other day she used the word obnoxious, when I asked what it meant she said irritating. She is so grown up and my baby girl is gone for ever.

My school year should be much improved then the last few. I love my new principal, I am getting a new group of children for the first time in two years. I am teaching second grade again, which I love.

Life will become crazy with trying to fit in exercise after work, driving children around, and preparing for the next day. I have decided to get involved in some committee work and am thinking about going to back to school to get my administration license.

Let's all hope that this school year proves to be one of the best.

Bittersweet times

2006-08-09T21:33:00.000-05:00

In a few hours, it will be 5 years to the day, since I held my precious little girl in my arms. I remember that day like it was yesterday. Going to the airport the first time, only to find them not on that plane. Visiting the airport the second time and knowing she was on that plane and when the employee from KLM told me they were going through customs was the most exciting thing. She was just the cutest little thing that was so tired and she won't put her head on my shoulders to fall asleep. She didn't know how to snuggle or kiss but learned very quickly and now every night she hugs at least ten times and tells me how much she loves me. It was the and still is the happiest day of my life. I waited a long time but I believe I was meant to parent this kid. I will always be thankful for her birthparents and hope some day to find them.

Every year on "Our Day" she gets to pick what we do. Her first idea was a hotel, but with the finances as they are that wasn't in the books this year. So her second choice, having breakfast at Krispy Kreme's. Yikes, not my idea of a great breakfast but needless to say we will drive through and pick up her favorite donut.

It is hard to believe that the child I brought home from the airport is starting school this year. She also lost her second tooth today. Did I mention that a friend, who watch two days last week, came up with the big idea of redoing her bedroom? Tonight listening to the two of them plan it all out was so adorable. May I add they are going to paint her room a hot pink!! At the moment it is a calming violet.

Ok, here is the bittersweet moment, Gill and I decided to call it quits today and be friends if that is possible. My thoughts are that he never was divorced and has been married the entire time. All the evidence says that but I was to stupid or in love to realize it. What I mean by that is I was never invited to family functions, he always seemed to call me from his cell phone when he wasn't home, and so on so on..... When I put up my three conditions of staying with him, he couldn't follow through on any of them so it was time to say goodbye. I am sad but more relieved to know where we stand in our relationship. He is losing maybe the best damn thing that walked into his life. I only hope I am strong enough to realize that myself.

Hope all is well with everyone.

Mary

Meetings....

2006-08-07T18:49:00.000-05:00

Today, Kiran and I had the pleasure of meeting Taz and Chris. They are such wonderful people. We met for lunch on my favorite street in St Paul, Grand Ave. Chris brought us two cinnamon rolls from one of my favorite bread stores. Kiran who ate most of her naked noodles, and some ice cream, couldn't wait until we got home to try her roll. She ate most of it and is saving the rest until tomorrow for breakfast.

After we left Chris and Taz we walked down Grand and stopped in Ten Thousand Villages and Kiran found a necklace from India she just had to have. Then it was off to my favorite bookstore called the Red Balloon. The day couldn't have been nicer for a walk on Grand.

Life seems to be on the mend.

Feeling sorry for myself.....

2006-08-04T15:06:00.000-05:00

People are being killed all over the world, children are starving to death, the world is going to hell and I am sitting here have my own pity party.

Yesterday, Gill came over and it seemed like old times. Just hanging out and spending time together. I was the one who brought up the subject of getting back together with his ex or not. He again told me that he is still in shock by it all. Not so sure what to do about it all.

Then I told him that if he was going to continue seeing me I needed to set down some rules.

#1 All four of us need to spend together, Gracia, Kiran and us.

#2 I would like to start being invited to family functions.

#3 We need to spend more time together.

This would all have to happen once he decides what he was doing with his life. He did tell me that he isn't telling Gracia about the proposal from the ex.

Only time will tell on this.

Then, my closest two friends went out of town together with two others today. They went to one of the others parent's cabin. Ok, this group I have been hanging out with 15 years. My two closet friends are my cousin Kim, and Karin (who I think the world of). Anyway, I don't get invited because Lynn doesn't like me. She has never told anyone why but I have my own thoughts on that. She finds me to competitive at gives, doesn't like me talking about the real world problems because it is easier not to face them, silly reason if you ask me.

Ok, so she doesn't invite me to her cabin but doesn't think twice about inviting me to her birthday party which was a $50 ticket to see REO Speedwagon. If I would have known I would not have gone. It is frustrating. Did I mention that I think every person in the Metro that I would hang out with is out of town this weekend also.

Thank goodness I have Kiran.

Enough, life really is good in most respects. This too, should all pass......

Thanks for the all support you guys and girls.

Phones, I hate them.....

2006-07-31T18:15:00.000-05:00

Over the last week, Mr. Gill hasn't been answering my phone calls. On Friday night, he left a message that he was just calling to say hi. On Saturday and Sunday, even though I left humorous and numorous messages, he didn't return any calls. Not like him!

So, this morning, I was sitting in a meeting, learning about leadership in schools. He called and left this message, "Baby, call me, we need to talk." Sounds just wonderful.....

I returned his call and he started out telling me that he has bad news, he spent the weekend with his ex and Gracia, and she wants to get back together. My question to him was is that bad news for you or me. My next question was does this mean it is over for us and his reply was, "I didn't say that."

So just what do you mean???

It means I don't have a clue what to do.

Ok, Gill, you know where I stand, you know how I feel about you. I cannot say anything that I haven't said. It is up to you to make this decision and only you.

We decided to meet on Thursday. Imagine that is the earliest common time we had. I love him but will have to let him go until he decides and if it is not me, that will have to it.

What is a girl to do??????

Mary

Life in MN

2006-07-30T20:52:00.000-05:00

Today we arrived home from 6 wonderful days in Northern MN and the Iron Range. It was a delightful time. The first three nights we spent at my dad's. At his house, we were treated to fresh, homegrown, green beans, homemade raspberry jam and muffins made with fresh raspberries, home made pickles and wonderful cooking. It was so nice to see Kiran get to spend some time with my dad and Norma.

On Friday, we moved on to Tower and Lake Vermilion. Friday night, Kiran had a treat, she got to swim in the lake with her clothes on. She thought that was hoot.
Saturday we spent part of the day hanging with my Grandma and all her wonderful baked goods. We were treated to potica, blueberry strudel and chocolate chip cookies. During the afternoon we went to a lovely beach where the water was so clear you could see the fish.

The weather was hot and humid for those parts of MN. It was difficult sleeping because most homes don't have air conditioning and the lake only helps so much. When we opened the door to our house, in Apple Valley, and the temperature was 85 degrees inside and 100 outside. The air is still trying to cool down our house.

It was the most relaxed I have been in a year or so.... I love going away but it is always nice coming home and sleeping in ones own bed.

Hope all is well with everyone and I hope to catch up tomorrow.

PS-For those of you who know cars, is it possible for the check engine light to come on because of bad gas and once the gas is gone, the light would go off???? My car is running fine, but on Monday night, the light came on. I brought it in to be checked before we left on Tuesday and they couldn't find anything wrong. After 250 miles the light went off.

Things Children Say

2006-07-22T20:34:00.000-05:00

This evening, Kiran and I just sat done to eat our dinner together. She grabbed my hand, looked me in the eye, and said, "I am so happy your my mom!" The smile was big and wide on her face. Needless to say, my eyes had tears in them.

She will never know how truly blessed I am to have her in my LIFE!!!

Hugs and kisses to all.

sin and sinners

2006-07-15T20:06:00.000-05:00

Tonight I was reading my posts from a yahoo group list I am on. One mom wanted to know how to handle her almost 6 year old's question, "WHat if no one wanted me? What would have happened to me?"

This was part of a reply, "Because of sin in this world some children/people live in conditions less desirable than others and your child is blessed to be with you (as you are to be with her.)". Is this person crazy???? So if this child should sin what is she going to think?? Her mom won't want her either!

So, because George Bush, Dick Cheney, Don Rumsfeld, and MANY MANY OTHERs have committed mortal sins, they should be living in a third world country or on the streets some place???? These people sin everyday and yet they still live in big houses, have more power than anybody in the world, and send our young people into conflict without batting an eye.

What is wrong with this picture?? Is a person poor, financially, because they sin??? Not in my world......

Mary

(It feels like the entire Twin Cities metro area is in hell with a temperature of 91 at 8:15. What did we do wrong??? That is right, we tend to vote Democratic in presidential elections.)

Mommy R & R

2006-07-09T23:08:00.000-05:00

This past Friday, shortly after summer school dismissed for the day, I was on my way to Hayward, WI, and a friend's cabin. Rule #1-NO CHILDREN!!! Kiran would be spending the weekend with my brother and family. Rule #2-Enjoy rule #1. Rule #3-Have a wonderful time......

I had a wonderful weekend. Kiran was happy and safe, I was having a 48 hour break from motherhood. The weather was wonderful, shopping stupendous, drinks absolutely delightful..... I came home with a hell of a sunburn, a Hello Kitty car cup for Kiran, a new skirt for me, and one huge hangover.

Some of you would be surprised how teachers can act together. It makes me wonder if K should be home schooled. (HAHAHAHAHA). We had a wonderful time talking and joking about men, life, children, and everything else.

The only problem was on Saturday evening, I received a picture of one 5 year old, minus her bottom right front tooth. She was so darn excited my message on the voice mail was the cutest ever. "Mommy, I lost me tooth. That is all the news I have for you. BYEBYE!!" OK, a little guilt surfaces and the old time moms are like it could have happened everywhere. Good point.

For those single parents out there, I highly recommend getting away for a few days. It will be great for your children and so darn relaxing for you......

Love to all,

Mary

4TH of July

2006-07-04T22:34:00.000-05:00

Today is our country's birthday. We are 230 years old. Why do I get the feeling that our country seems to be dying a slow death???

We are in a war that we will not win and have only seen our young men and women die in. It is a place in the world that has never been stable and might never will be.

Why do we always take Israel's side in everything??? Ok, I understand both sides of their issues. It is time we look at both sides and not make judgments against others.

Why aren't we taking care of Korea?? They are the country that might be able to take us down and today, on our birthday, they decided to flex their muscles. A friend called me at 5:45 this afternoon asking what part of the country is being attacked by Korea and why nothing has been done about it. My answer, we are to busy taking care of the oil to worry about someone else.

Not to mention, why aren't we doing something about health care, NCLB (the worst law this administration passed), and equal rights for all?????

In Eagan, MN, the parade that K and I attended, is the home of our Governor. He has lived here forever, and is running for his job again. Did he bother to show up or even have people giving out stickers? NO!! I hope people took notice.........He was a state representative and was ok, for a republican. Then, when he was elected governor, he became a BUSH YES GUY...... SCARY!!!!

Tonight I go to bed wondering if I am proud to be a citizen of this land. Before 9-11, I Swear, I was the only one who got goosebumps listening to the anthem. I was the most patriotic person I knew. I loved this country. Today, people's phone conversations are being recorded, our call records looked at, the books you check out from the publice library are being recored, all in the name of terrorism. BULLSHIT!! Our rights are slowly being taken a way from us and not many people are seeing this.

WE hope all had a wonderful 4th.

Love ya,

Mary and Kiran

June 30, 1993

2006-06-28T23:02:00.000-05:00

It was a Wednesday, no different from any other day. I went to my school to ick up my materials for teaching fourth grade, then went out for lunch with my SIL and her mother. After lunch, it was time to go to the part time job, my cousin (who is one of my best friends is my boss), to help with inventory.

I talked to my mom around 9 that morning. We discussed the fact she was checking into the hospital in Duluth to have her foot amputated. She sounded fine, I told her I would see her in the morning and that I loved her. It was the last time I ever talked to her.

Shortly after I arrived at my part time job, a call came in from my SIL saying I needed to get to Duluth ASAP. Duluth is a 2 1/2 hour drive from MPLS. I asked why, and she said something happened when my mom was checking into the hospital and they are calling the family. She told me to go home and that she would call when Mike was ready to leave so we could drive up together.......

At this point in time, I was living with my friend Karin and her daughter. Karin for some reason that day took the day off. All I can say is God works in mysterious ways. I arrived home, not knowing if I should pack, just leave for Duluth or what. As I walked into my bedroom, I saw I had several messages on my answering machine. There were 3 hang ups. I finally decided to call St. Mary's up in Duluth to find out what was going on. The first person I talked to did not have my mom listed as a patient. Finally, she asked me to hold on. She had connected me to emergency and they put my dad on the line. When I asked him what was going on he told me the worst possible thing happened.......Of course I had to ask what and he told me that we lost her about 20 minutes ago. My mom passed away at 2:15 pm on this date. At this point I tried calling my SIL at work and they put her boss on who told me that Denise knew and was on her way home. He tried so hard to comfort me but that was impossible.

Karin, the wonderful, kind person she was, threw a bunch of clothes in a suitcase for me and we waited together for my SIL, brother, and niece to pick me up to drive north. Not to mention she called my closets friends to tell them what had happened.

I remember that entire day like it was yesterday. When I got into the back seat of the car, my niece Laura, who was 2 at the time, looked at me and said, "Your mom just died."

We took the 3 1/2 ride in total silence after that. The only noise that could be heard was sobbing everytime we took a turn to signal we were one step closer to being home.

All the way up north, I kept thinking this cannot be true. How can I lose my mom before I lost a grandparent? I was 29 years old, this wasn't suppose to happen until I was much older.....Life can be so cruel sometimes!!!!

The vision I can see is turning down our street, in Hoyt Lakes, and seeing all the cars parked in front of our house. It was at that time, I really understood what was happening. My aunts, grandparents, cousins, and friends were all there to greet us with their tears, words of condolence, and all the food you could ever imagine. The only thing missing was MY MOM!!!!

At that point, I didn't think I would live through it. She was my best friend, the woman who taught me how to love, to parent, and reach for my dreams.

Thank you mom for everything you taught me, for the morals you gave me, and the unconditional love that was present always. If I am half the mom you were, Kiran is in good shape.

Kiran would have loved her and she would have loved Kiran. My only regrent is she went to her grave thinking I didn't want children. If she could tell me now what she thinks!!!!!!

I LOVE YOU MOM!!!

Minneapolis Public Schools

2006-06-22T19:29:00.000-05:00

Ok, time to yell and scream about the school district I work for......

In January, the district switched over to an automated payroll system. It is all electronic, you don't get a pay stub unless you can get online and copy it. Well, people have had issues with it since the beginning. I didn't have any until the last pay period. I get paid every other Friday. I thought my check was smaller then it should have been, but I have been doing extra work, and wasn't so sure. On Saturday, I had a check from the district in my mail box. It seems they forgot to pay me for a sick day. Today, I checked on tomorrows check.... It seems, due to a program problem, I am only getting paid half my salary. That is so nice. I have bills to pay and checks that will be bouncing. How long do you think it should take to get the bugs out of the system?

Today was my first day of summer school. I have been at these useless meetings, NCLB related for three days. I walked into a classroom with 32, yes I said 32, first graders. This program is suppose to be for those children who need extra help catching up to their peers. Ok, I cannot help anyone catch up with 32 kids. It is amazing, I feel like I am babysitting at less then a dollar an hour per kid. I would make out better financially providing daycare in my home for the summer.

This district doesn't have a leader at the moment. It is so mixed up, I just wished, financially, I could just leave. Maybe someday when Mr. Right asks me to marry him.

Have a great weekend all. My started at 1 this afternoon.....

Mary

A HUGE Accomplishment

2006-06-15T20:00:00.000-05:00

The thrill of victory......(In a way)

2006-06-11T10:16:00.000-05:00

Here is a photo of Kiran and I. This was taken Memorial Day.

On to the thrill of victory....

Friday morning, I was walking into school with my nephew and Kiran. Both were coming on the field trip with my class. The assistant principal and principal were waiting for me at the top of the stairs. Once Thomas and Kiran went up to my room, the assistant principal approached me and told me she heard about the meeting yesterday afternoon. She told me that she never brought my name up to Michelle and what Michelle said at the meeting was a lie. She was going to talk with her and make her apologize to me in front of the entire staff. My principal also told me how angry she was with her.

Shortly after the day started, Michelle and Evelyn (the assistant principal) came to my room where Michel approached me and apologized to me and Evelyn told me she would be doing this in front on the staff after school.

It was also lay off day in Minneapolis for next year. The meeting started right at 2:30 where Michelle apologized to me. She also told the staff we should wait until next school year to make our decision on union steward. Right after that, she announced that she was laid off and wouldn't be back. So, if we would have waited to make our decision, like I suggested, we never would have had that meeting and discussion where she totally bashed me several times.

It also makes me feel better that the one staff member who I thought I could trust, did apologize to me and wanted to make sure that I was ok. She did tell me that she didn't sleep the night before because she realized that she hurt and was truly sorry. That felt really good.

So the decision to who will be the steward next year will be made in August, no one will want the position and everyone will just assume I am going to it. They are TRULY WRONG!!!!!

I made me happy walking out of that school on Friday. I knew I didn't do anything wrong and was professional throughout the entire mess.

Hope everyone is having a wonderful weekend.

Mary

AGONY OF DEFEAT........

2006-06-08T20:34:00.000-05:00

For the past 8 or so years, I have been the union steward at my school. Most of the time this title came by default and no one else was willing to it. This past fall, I told the staff I was taking the year off. My reasons to them were personal but mostly because I was tired of butting heads with a principal who was off the wall.

When our new principal came into our building, she asked me if I would be willing to step back into in the position. She talked to the staff about it, which most of them forgot about today, and they all thought that was great. At that point, I told them honestly I wouldn't be going to any meetings until next year. After all, I took the damn year off.

This new chick shows up in our building and is what I would refer to as a bully. She spouts professionalism all the time, yet she comes to school in torn clothes, jeans, and looking like she is working a garage sale. She yelled at the staff her first week on the job during a staff meeting, steals (which i have seen her do), doesn't get her paperwork in on time, she thinks that everyone in the building owes her and yelled at me in the hallway last week.

Damn, I am so angry, but a certain faction of the building decided that she would do a better job then I would. That was during the union meeting today, when she lied about things I did or didn't do on several occasions, making allegations that were not true, and when I would try to defend myself I looked like the poor sport. I didn't bring up one negative thing about her and guess who won........................

It reminded me of the Republicans in the last few elections. Focus on the negative and you shall be the victor. Did I forget to mention that the faction that voted for her where mainly Republicans????? I hope they all learn what I already know. My friends tried their best but failed. Some people, who I thought were friends, totally stabbed me in the back. I hope they come and ask me in the next few days to babysit some of their kids. The answer will be NO!!!! Tomorrow they will come up to me and tell me how sorry they are, what a bunch of bullshit!

Thanks for letting me vent.....

Mary

Photo Sunday

2006-06-04T09:53:00.000-05:00

This is Tower, Mn and Kiran showing us how to sit in a tree. She was hanging out with my nephew and cousin. They had so much fun, roasting hot dogs, making smores, and climbing trees. I love when 12 year old boys can have so much fun with a 5 year old.

Here is Kiran, Thomas (My Nephew), and James (My cousin's son).

On our way home, Kiran told me that she just wished the weekend was starting and not over. We love it up there.

Mary

HOT HOT HOT........

2006-06-03T08:44:00.000-05:00

This week in Minneapolis it has been in the low to high 80s all week. The skies have been sunny and the last week of May would have been weather perfect if I wasn't in school. My building was built in 1927. It is a lovely brick school with tons of windows, something the newer schools are lacking!

My room is on the third floor and faces toward the east. When the sun is shining, it warms the room up so nicely in the winter but..... On Thursday when I walked in and checked the temperature in my room it was 90 degrees already at 7:30 am. It makes for miserable days and very short nights. I have been thinking I was getting sick but then realized I was exhausted every night from being in that sauna daily. Kiran seems to have been putting herself to sleep because this mommy is going to bed at 8:30 every night. So, I have been praying for 60 and rainy. The kids are so excited to get out and we have 2 weeks left.....

On another note, the teeth are loose and Kiran couldn't be happier. We discovered last week, on our way up north, that one of her bottom front teeth was loose and yesterday I noticed the one next to it is also. She is moving in with my brothers when the fairy is coming seeing two out of the three told her the tooth fairy brings $50 a tooth. T

It has been crazy around these parts. We spent 3 1/2 wonderful days in on Lake Vermilion and in Tower. The weather was wonderful but we each brought home several sand fly and mosquito bites. For this early in the season the bugs were terrible....

Hope all is well with everyone.

Mary

Changing moments...

2006-05-24T20:14:00.000-05:00

Today, my baby girl who came home to me at 8 1/2 months old, graduated from preschool. I cannot believe that this child has grown up so much. She acts like she is 15 and so ready for kindergarten. If her mommy would just take some time to learn her she would be reading. I took the day off to watch my baby in a short program and get a small diploma (hopefully one of at least 5). We then went out to lunch and that was so much fun. She was so excited. I asked her on the way home if she was excited for kindergarten in the fall. Her reply, "You know mommy, when you liked something so much and it is over, don't you just want to go back?" I know that feeling well Kiran. It was so sweet. We came home and watch a few episodes of Full House and napped together. I just loved this day. Kiran fell asleep at 6:30 and I expect her to sleep all night.

In 15 school days, I will say goodbye to my class. It is a class that I have mostly had for 2 years. I have seen many sibling be born, divorces happening, marriages taking place and so on. I have complained so much about this group in the last few years, Inger can attest to that. In reality, I am going to miss the Ali's and Ahmed's in the world. I truly think this is part of my mood in the last few days.

Not to mention, the fact that my relationship to Gill, seems to be turning into a more comfortable position and that scares me. We seem to be having a hard time getting together but after tonight I feel better. We had a talk about how I know that his mother and daughter are his top priorities but I need to know that I am up there. He told me he does understand and will put forth an effort to make me feel that way.

I dislike reality tv but for American Idol. I am so happy that Taylor Hicks won this evening.

Love ya all,

Mary

question

2006-05-23T20:28:00.000-05:00

How can someone on two anti-depressants be depressed?????

2006-05-16T20:54:00.000-05:00

This was borrowed from Inger. Go to Google and type in "your name is". Make sure to include the quotation marks.... It was interesting.

MARY IS MODEL OF PERSEVERING SILENCE.
Mary is the cause of our joy.
Mary is co-redeemer (co-redemptrix) with Jesus Christ. ...
Mary is alluded to as Queen in the book of Revelations
Mary is in heaven
The Catholic Mary is a devil!
Mary is repeated by just one girl who is either
Mary is summoned whenever squealing girls get together for a sleepover,
Mary is a popular female given name
Mary is connected on many points with that to the Heart of Jesus;

Imagine it was mostly about the Mother of Jesus......

I hope everyone is having a great week.

Mary

Insecurities.....

2006-05-13T19:27:00.000-05:00

I am so wild about Gill. In my life I have never had a relationship that has lasted this long with an unattached man. Ok, I had two affairs with married men and those lasted a couple of years a piece. Maybe it was because I knew they weren't going to go anywhere.

Gill is different, it has been over 5 months, we talk everyday, see each other as often as possible. The last few times that I have been with him, though, for the first 30 minutes, I swear I am waiting for the ball to drop and him to tell me he doesn't want to see me any more. I don't think he really feels this way, but it scares the hell out of me. What is this????

I know that I am one strong woman, but at times don't want to be strong, I know I can live on my own, I have done it for 41 years. I am a good parent, I think, and would be a wonderful step parent to his daughter. Hell, I would make a hell of a wife just knowing what my mom has instilled in me. I do not think I am afraid to compromise, to live a life with another human being...

This summer he is going to Troy, New York to work a basketball camp. He invited to come out for a few days. When he found out I was serious about showing up, he was so excited. He couldn't believe that I would find a babysitter for Kiran for 4 or 5 days and fly out to see him. He couldn't believe that I would do that for him.

Does anyone have any idea what Troy is like????

This feeling so strongly for some one is hard. It is easy with Kiran, she isn't going anywhere for at least 13 years........

I will get through these feeling but I hope that I don't do anything to wreck this relationship in the mean time....

Mary

The other side of the table

2006-05-09T20:48:00.000-05:00

I cannot believe how long it has been since I have blogged. We have been busy girls at our house.

Last Friday, I had a conference with Kiran's preschool teacher. It is always so interesting being on the other side of the table. Her teacher told me that she was ready for Kindergarten and was when she walked into preschool this past fall. That doesn't surprise me. I told her recently that she would be reading if mommy wasn't to tired to teach her when I got home from school. She proceed to tell my SIL the following, "Denise, my mommy said I would be reading if she LEARNED me, but she is to tired from LEARNING other kids to LEARN me." That makes a mom feel really good. Damn, where are my priorities,they may be the following: food on the table, a roof over us, a car to drive, and those clothes she loves......

Her teacher told me that she doesn't like to dance and sing with the class. I found that odd because she is always singing in the car and she goes to dance class, as evidence shows. In fact in a week and half she will have her second dance recital. When I asked her why, she told me she didn't like those songs that told you what to do. This is a quote, "Mommy I like to do my own thing." The kid is five, lord I think trouble is ahead of me.

The other concern they had was that she doesn't interact with the boys. She made reference to me being single and that is maybe why she doesn't. I told her that was just silly seeing that for the first four years she had a male daycare provider and she sees her cousins and my brother frequently. BTW-who says you should like boys at five????

All in all, they do love her. She is quiet but not as shy as she was at the beginning of the year. She is a perfectionist, who takes in her time doing her work and follows directions just the way she should. It amazes me how different she is at home. Following directions is not happening at our house.

I am one proud mommy and will take complete responsibility for her intelligence, her temper belongs to her birth parents. HAHAHAHA!!

Hope all is well with everyone.

Photo Sunday on Monday

2006-05-01T18:22:00.000-05:00

Here is a photo of the two of us......What else can I say....

Updates.....

2006-04-24T19:33:00.000-05:00

First, good news, the birthfather of my daycare provider, was arrested today for aiding and abedding his birth son in the escape. It seems that for months he has been tucking money away just for this purpose and provided him with a hacksaw to get through the security bars. What is really sad is that both my SIL and daycare provider told the BCA not to trust him and look carefully at him. The head investigator told Dana that he was being so open with them and giving them names of people who could be hiding him.

Secondly, the weekend was wonderful. We talked non-stop on our way to Aberdeen. It was fun to be away with another adult and no kids in the area. I like that man more everytime I see him. We were both exhausted yesterday and today. We let SD at 5:45 in the morning after only have around 3 hours of sleep. On Friday night sleep wasn't had by me either. We did do some shopping on Saturday morning and I found out that he loves to shop, I think more then I do. I was going to buy a cheap diamond necklace and he told me not to. He didn't like it and said he would buy me a different one when he can go and pick it out by himself. Only time will tell........

This is just how kind he is, I was napping on Saturday afternoon and he went and vaccuumed my car and washed it. My friends loved his sense of humor, his kindness, and personality.

Hope you all had a wonderful weekend.

Mary

The Eyes are the Window to our Soul......

2006-04-23T16:38:00.000-05:00

Check in

2006-04-19T20:30:00.000-05:00

Hi All,

I did decide to send Kiran to daycare this week. Dana's brother is still missing but was sighted in Northern MN, close to where they grew up, on Monday. Since then, there have been no reports of where he is. He hasn't tried to contact anyone in his family and the authorities said that if he didn't within 24 hours chances where slim that he would. His parents, his birthmother and adoptive father are scared that he is going to come after them for money but so far so good. The authorities don't believe that he has any way to get money or gas so eventually, if they let him hide in the woods in northern MN he will surface. Dana does have a system in her house, compliments of the Eagan police department, that if he should show up all they have to do is press a button and within 5 minutes some one will be at their house.

She hasn't talked to him for 14 years. He didn't even know that he had 2 nieces and nephew by her. That was until his last visitor, the oldest sister of the family, had a visit with him over a year ago. She told him all the facts about the siblings and their families.

Dana and family are trying to live as normally as possible. All schools have been alerted and my SIL saw a police presence at the elementary school during dismissal today. We are all hoping that he is back in custody soon and this nightmare will be over for her family.

On a positive note, this weekend, Gill and I are escaping to a wedding in South Dakota. I cannot tell you how excited I am to have him all to myself for 48 hours. Ok, there is the wedding but maybe we won't even make it. HAHAHAHA!!! I am picking him up at noon on Friday and off we go. A 6 hour car ride together. If that doesn't make or break us, I don't know what will........

I don't even want to think of the politics in the world, what I don't know cannot worry me..... My life has never been so full yet there is this looming threat of nuclear war..

Have a great weekend and I will let you all know when the sex offender is caught.....

See you all on Sunday.....

Mary

sex offenders

2006-04-16T18:46:00.000-05:00

This afternoon, while we were enjoying a wonderful Easter, the phone rang at my brother's house. It was our daycare provider telling us some news I didn't need to hear. It seems that last night 4 sex offenders escaped from a mental facility in St Peter, MN. Three out of the four have been captured and are in custody. The fourth just happens to be her brother who I have never heard her talk about. He has been in this facility since 1989 and was never to get out. He was in for rape and other things. It seems that the state police, city and county police are making extra patrols around her house in case he contacts them. He was sighted within 10 miles of her house. She would totally understand if I didn't send Kiran over there tomorrow. Her husband is working from home until he is found and they are living in a state of lock up at her house. I love this woman and I know that they think of Kiran as one of their own. They would never put her in danger but what the hell do I do? I am almost out of sick days, don't have back up this week and work wise it is a terrible week to take off.

But, if something happens to my baby I will never forgive myself. Something to ponder this evening. I hope all is well with everyone.

Mary

Poppy Seed Chicken

2006-04-15T19:15:00.000-05:00

This is my speciality. Whenever I am cooking for family this is the request that is made. Tomorrow, on Easter, I will be preparing it.

Four chicken breasts cut in chucks
2 cans of cream of chicken soup (I use Cambell's Healthy Request)
16 oz of sour cream (I use the light sour cream)
2 1/2 rolls of ritz crackers
3 TBSP of poppy seeds
2 sticks of butter (I use no salt added.)
rice or noodles

Brown chicken breasts in oil olive and I throw in a little white wine.

Once chicken is browned place in the bottom of an 9 x 11 pan. I also spray pam on the bottom before putting in the chicken.

Mix the soup and sour cream together and pour on top of the chicken.

Crush the crackers and mix in with the poppyseeds and place over the chicken soup, sour cream mixture.

Melt your sticks of butter and drizzle over the top.

Bake at 350 for 60 minutes.

Serve on top of rice or noodles. My family prefers the rice.

I usually also serve a salad, asparagus, and bread.

Hope you enjoy. Happy Easter ALL!!!

Mary

Single parenthood......

2006-04-13T19:06:00.000-05:00

Today my darling little angel came to school with me. What was I THINKING???? We started our morning with WW3. She hated her clothes, her hair, and school. Of course, she was tired. We stopped and pick up breakfast at Brueggers and then off to Minneapolis. Let me add we are dogsitting this weekend and staying at my brother's house. I truly think I only slept about 3 hours total.

Once we got to school it was the usual, "Kiran you are getting so big!" "Kiran you are so beautiful." She must of felt she was in a show case. People who I don't really talk to, came to my room just to see her. Most of the day, ok all of it, she was like a leech. I don't think she left my side for more then 5 minutes. By 9:30 I was wondering if I was going to survive. Not only did I have 25 other children wanting my attention, I had her, the most important kid in my life, there also.

I love when people pay attention to her but I have such a difficult time when they are always saying to her and me how beautiful she is. I try to add and smart to, but sometimes it just doesn't work. You would think teachers had better sense!!!

Anyway, we got back to my brother's house around 4:30 this evening, I went to change into my jammies, poured a glass of wine, and ordered pizza. The only problem is it is 80 degrees outside and I should be out there playing.

I am feeling like a lousy parent this evening, hopefully it will pass.

Happy Passover and Easter to all who celebrate.

Mary

Republican Party

2006-04-09T09:07:00.000-05:00

In light of the recent developments this week with the Republican party, I thought I just had to post this photo. I forgot I even had it.

So, some day, I hope there will be sign about the down fall of this wonderful party. HAHAHA!!!

Cross cultures

2006-04-09T08:30:00.000-05:00

This photo was taken at our first India Culture Camp in June of 2002. All of the girls are from the same orphanage in Kolkata. The last three in the photo are Adrita, Kiran and Emma. Kiran and Emma have been best buddies since Kiran set foot in the US. Emma is a year older but they act like teenager when together. Adrita is the same age as Emma and we are very fortunate to get to see her once a year.

This is Kiran and Emma. At the same culture camp.

My point to all of this is that I try to incorporate India culture into our lives when ever possible. We have many children books, picture books and so on. Also, I love getting our play group together where many of the children are from India. Kiran loves to play with them and loves playing with other "brown" children. This week, Kiran and I went to see the movie Mystic India at the local science museum. She told me on the way out that she didn't like the movie one bit. I, on the other hand, loved it. Last night we had a conversation about India and she told me she didn't want me talking about it any more, India that is. She doesn't want to learn about it because she doesn't remember anything about it and when people ask her where she is from she is telling them Apple Valley. I abide by her requests and my guess is that it is a stage and I need to back off but it made me a little sad for her.

So for know India is a subject that is taboo up and will have to wait for her lead as to when we discuss it again.

Mary

DInner and DeLay

2006-04-04T09:49:00.000-05:00

Dinner was wonderful. Gill enjoyed it and couldn't believe how fabulous it was. I haven't posted about it because the evening ended and a difficult note or should I say lack of communication. It took us until yesterday to resolve things, it seems everytime one had a chance to talk the other had a kid around (the life of single parenthood). Anyway, all is well. Relationships really are hard work but I think this one is worth working at keeping.

Last night, after watching Florida beat UCLA, I checked my emails and went to bed delighted at my email from CNN. It put a smile on my face to see that DeLay wasn't running for re-election and then I read that he was going to resign from the House. That is wonderful news for our entire country. Now if we can only do something about those two idiots who are running the White House........

Mary

PS-What is a good sight to pick up photos from??? Does anyone have any ideas?

This was fun.....

2006-04-02T19:49:00.000-05:00

21 Firsts...

1. Who was your first prom date? Randy Ledin, he died a few years ago due to a brain hemorrhage
2. Who was your first roommate(s)? I cannot remember her name but she drove me crazy a while I was at the U of MN. She tried out for cheerleading and made it. She got up every morning at 5 and made tons of noise. It was a great experience.
3. What alcoholic beverage did you drink the first time you got drunk? It was beer at the local abandon mine pit.
4. What was your first job? Babysitting, I could have worked every Friday and Saturday night while I was in Junior High. The first time I did actually babysat, the couple came home at 4 am.
5. What was your first car? 1988 Mercury Topaz. I bought it brand new after I signed my first teaching contract in Houston, Tx.
6. When did you go to your first funeral? It was my cousin Kim's grandma. I was 14.
7. How old were you when you first moved away from your hometown? If you count college it was in 1985, not counting college it would have been in 1988 when I moved to Houston.
8. Who was your first grade teacher? Mrs. Thompson.
9. Where did you go on your first ride on an airplane? To Buffalo, New York to visit my aunt and uncle who lived in Dansville. I was in the sixth grade.
10. When did you sneak out of your house for the first time, who was it with? OMG, I would have never dared to sneak out of the house. My mom would have killed me.
11. Who was your first Best Friend and are you still friends with them? Rita, she lives about 4 hours away and we might not see each for a few years but we talk on a regular basis. We were 5 when we met. She was playing Barbies with my best friend at the time.
12. Where did you live the first time you moved out of your parents house? It was a dorm on the university of MN, Minneapolis campus.
13. Who is the first person you call when you have a bad day? Denise, my SIL.
14. Who's wedding were you in the first time you were a bridesmaid/groomsman? My brother Mike's.
15. What is the first thing you do in the morning? Take a shower.
16. What was the first concert you ever went to? Loverboy.....
17. First tattoo or piercing? Ears pierced in the sixth grade, they had to grow in. Then I had them done again when I was senior.
18. First celebrity crush? Clark Brandon. Remember him!!!
19. Age of first kiss? When I was in the fourth grade!
20. First crush? My fifth grade teacher, Mr. French.
21. First time you did drugs? In the tenth grade........

Anyone who would like to participate.....

Mary

Age three

2006-04-02T08:14:00.000-05:00

I was going through some photos yesterday and came across this one of me around the age of three.

This was taken in 1967 life at three was pretty good.

Happy photo Sunday!!

Life......

2006-03-29T16:18:00.000-06:00

Life is much better these last three days from what it was on Sunday.

In MN, the sun has been shining and the temperatures really delightful. People are walking around in there short sleeves and capris. One would thing we were Florida. Ok, the temperatures are only in the 50s.

Saturday night, Gill is coming over for dinner. It will be the first time that I actually cook for him. This is the menu, just wondering what you guys think....

Starting out with shrimp cocktails for an appetizer moving on to the main course:

Main course:

Filet Mignon stuffed with blue cheese
Asparagus with a cream sauce
Brown rice and broccoli

For desert:

A wonderful cake with three different types of berries.

Any other ideas????? Do I need a salad?

Kiran informed me last night that she no longer wants to be a heart surgeon but a science girl instead. The kid loves doing experiments and some day is going to blow up the house the way she mixes things.

I hope everyone is having a wonderful week.

Mary

The Bear Family

2006-03-26T20:37:00.000-06:00

This is Polar Bear, Brown Bear, and Grizzly Bear. Polar Bear is my niece Helayna, Brown Bear is Kiran, and Grizzly Bear is my brother Mike. All three like to play their bear game. It is really funny to watch.......

Kiran loves Mike and Mike loves Kiran. It makes my heart smile when I see the two of them interact together. Tonight, Kiran came home with a new fishing lure that her uncle gave her. They love to look at lures together. Go figure, my girl from India, a little fisher girl.

Mary

Down in the dumps

2006-03-26T09:37:00.000-06:00

No photo today.....

You know the feeling when your life in on cruise control with the same thing happening every weeknight and then all of a sudden part of it is gone? I always feel so lost this weekend every year. Basketball is finished and so is my Tuesday and Friday night entertainment. I love b-ball season. It keeps me going throughout the winter. Last night the highschool season came to an end. My brother's team took third place in the state tournament which was a disappointment because they really had a chance to win. Gill's team took second and that was very exciting because they weren't even suppose to be there.

Today I am feeling lost at sorts. Worried my relationship with Gill is going to change without that basketball connection for a 8 months. No more talking strategy or about his players or my brother's team and strategy. Hopefully our love for baseball will take that place.

I hate this empty feeling and my life is so full......

Have a great day all!

Sorry for being such a downer on a beautiful spring day in MN.

Mary

March Madness

2006-03-18T19:17:00.000-06:00

It is March Madness in these parts. Both Gill's and my brother's teams have made it to the MN State Tournament beginning on Wednesday. I am so thankful tonight that they will not meet each other seeing they are in different classes and I would have a difficult deciding who should win and then if I stayed neutral they both would be wondering why......

Gill's team played their best game this season last night. I was so excited for him. It will be the first time in 56 years that the school he coaches for goes to state. Hopefully then can win a few more games. Last night we had a wonderful time celebrating, just the two of us.

On Thursday evening, my brother's team won their game. They will be going to state for the first time in 5 years. The kids are excited and someone even brought in sparkling cider for them to pour over each other when they won. Hopefully they will win three more games and be the champions.

I have to say, as a basketball lover, I am loving every minute of this. Gill cannot believe that I care enough to come to his games. He loves the fact he can talk some strategy and I actually understand it. It was so much fun to see him so excited last night. Hopefully next Saturday night I will be celebrating two state victories.......

Have a wonderful week everyone, hopefully mine is going to be busy watching b-ball......

Mary

Best Ever Rum Cake

2006-03-17T23:41:00.000-06:00

I decided to participate in recipe Saturday. Hope you all enjoy. It is one of my favorites.......

1 qt. rum baking powder
1c. butter 1 tsp. soda
1 tsp. sugar Lemon juice
2 large eggs Brown Sugar
2 c. dried fruit Nuts

Before you start, sample the rum for quality. Good, isn't it? Now select a large mixing bowl. Check the rum again. It must be just right. Be sure rum is of high quality. Pour 1 cup rum into a glass and drink it as fast as you can.
With an electric mix, beat 1 cup butter in a large, fluffy bowl. Add 1 seaspoon of tugar and beat again. Meanwhilee make sure the rum is of the highest quality. Try another cup. Add orge laggs, 2 cups of fried druit and beat unilt high. If the fried druie gets stuck in the beaters, just pry it loose with a screwdriver. Sample the rum again for toncisticity.
Nest, sift 3 cups of baking poweder, a pinch of rum, a seaspoon of tods, and a cup of pepper or salt (it really doesn't matter).
Sample the rum again. Sift 2 pints of lemon juice. Fold in schopped butter and strained nuts. Add 1 bablespoon of brown sugar or whatever you find. Mix well.
Grease oven and turn cake pan to 350 gredees and bake poothtick comes out clean.

The family

2006-03-12T11:52:00.000-06:00

This picture of the family was taken back in the summer of 1986. We were celebrating the 50 wedding anniversary of my mom's parents, Frank and Vida.

The first person from left to right is my "baby brother". He is 2 1/1 years younger than me and was a total mommies boy. Today he is married to a lawyer and the very proud father and Jack and Grace. He works for a mortgage in Minneapolis. He has pulled the most away from the family since my mom's death in 1993. He can weeks without talking to my dad. It truly is sad because his family lives 5 miles from me and see his kids maybe once a month.

Next is me, the only girl in the family.

My mom and dad follow. Next to my dad is the oldest sibling in the family. He has always been very intelligent and was mulitpling and dividing at the age of three. Today he is still a wiz at math!! He is the proud father of three adorable children and his wife does daycare in their home. He works for an agency in Northern MN that helps build business up on the Iron Range.

Next to him is my brother Mike. The most emotional of the brothers. He has a difficult time attending funerals, talking about people being sick, and visiting them in hospitals. He just becomes an emotional wreck. His wife, Denise, is the closest person to the a sister I have. We have so much in common and she has always been there for me. They have the three children, two girls and boy. I am closest to these three and could be considered their second mother. He is the basketball coach and Dean of Students at an all boys catholic school in the Minneapolis area.

The famliy, all born of the same parents but so different in attitude and personality. The family dynamics are just so interesting.

Happy Sunday all.

Mary

My class

2006-03-09T21:54:00.000-06:00

These are the children that make me so angry, laugh, cry and proud. I hang out with them 5 days a week from 8 to 2:15.

This class is a little more diverse then Kiran's don't you think.

Mary

Kirby

2006-03-06T19:23:00.000-06:00

Puck, you may have had some hard times in the last 3 years but all of us in Minnesota and those who have followed the Twins will never forget the memories you have provided to us.

Who can forget that game 6 when you took a home run away only to come up in the next inning and hit it out of the park. To hear Jack Buck say "SEE YOU TOMORROW NIGHT." It elated the entire state. The time you went 6 for 6 against Milwaukee or just when you would smile out there on the ball field but you always remember that it was just a game and life was short. You lived yours to the fullest.

We're gonna win Twins,
We're gonna score,
We're gonna win Twins,
Watch that baseball sore.

Knock out a home run,
Join the hit parade,
Cheer for the Minnesota Twins today.........

Thanks for the memories Kirby......

The entire state of MN is praying for your family and two children.

WE LOVE YOU!!!!

My first dream come true.....

2006-03-05T15:43:00.000-06:00

My days in Eleventh grade as a basketball cheerleader. That year the team's best five players were suspended for almost the entire season for drinking. We lost almost all of the games. It still was fun and dream I always had, to be a cheerleader. Today, I am helping Kiran understand it might be more fun to play then to cheer. When she saw the photo she said I looked weird. The comment came from the glasses and hair style. So early 80s.....

Today, I watch and cheer from the sidelines. It has been an interesting basketball season seeing I have been watching and following two high school teams. It is tournament time and hopefully both teams I am watching will make it to state.

Mary

Life

2006-03-04T01:12:00.000-06:00

Well, it is the weekend. Kiran is sleeping over at friends, her daughter is adopted from the same orphanage, just one year before. They are great friends and when I talked with K this evening she was all giggling and stuff. My girl is old enough for sleepovers and enjoying it. It makes me so happy but yet so sad.

This morning, Leo passed away. It is so sad but yet, I know he is happy. I saw my friend for a few minutes today and will spend more time with her and the family tomorrow. I was just so sad all day today. So many memories came to the surface.

Tonight, I went to Gill's game. They lost the conference championship in overtime. We went out for pizza after. I am telling you guys, this is so different from anything I have ever experienced. He just makes me so happy and every place in my heart is full.

Have a great Saturday and we will see you on Photo Sunday.... That is if I can the photo I want to post.....

Love you all for the kind words and support that you always give.

Mary

Emotions....

2006-03-01T20:00:00.000-06:00

Today they have been up and down. Last night, Gill and I had a wonderful talk and we have, it seems, made it through our first difficult hurdle. The entire issue was due to alcohol on my part and I will forever be happy that he isn't holding it against me. I fall in love more with him everytime I see and talk to him. The entire thing, for a person who has been so in control of her life, is very scary. Not to mention getting two children involved with the relationship. I really think I am ready.....

This evening, I found out one of dearest friends, maybe losing her father sooner then we thought. It brings back so many memories of the time my mom was sick and then passed away so suddenly on us. Looking back 13 years ago, I am happy that it happened the way it did. She didn't suffer for a prolonged time and lived a wonderful quality of life until the end. She would not have been happy with less. It just breaks my heart to see someone I love go through that pain. Parents are such a special part of our lives.

Please pray Leo and his family. They truly are the most wonderful family and people!!!! In Gill's words, "They are good PEOPLE!"
Mary

Sunday Afternoon Photos

2006-02-26T16:25:00.000-06:00

This is one of my favorite places. It is beautiful Lake Vermilion. It is one of the best walleye lakes in the state.

My grandparents built their house on the lake back in the mid 50s. I have been going to this location ever since I was born. When my grandparents passed away, my dad and brothers bought the house so we can continue to build memories with our children. When I was young I hated having to go to the lake. It wasn't until I moved to Texas did I really start appreciating the view and location.

This is the view from the patio and it is a wonderful place to sit back and enjoy on those wonderful summer days, reading a good book, having a nice cook drink and soaking up the sun.

My grandpa use to say that he has seen the sunset in Hawaii and that Lake Vermilion's sunsets were the best in the world. I haven't seen the sunset in Hawaii but I do so enjoy it here.

Happy Sunday all....

Daddies

2006-02-23T20:43:00.000-06:00

This evening I called my daycare provider to tell her that Kiran would be late and my SIL would be dropping her off in the morning. She then told me that she has something to show me. It is a book that Kiran was writing this morning and in it she wrote that she missed and loved her daddy in India. This freaked Dana out a little but I told her that I thought it was normal and that I wanted to keep the book. Tben part of me feels so sad for her that she is growing up without a daddy. Now the kid has my three brothers who step into that role nicely but none of them live with us. I don't know if this is coming from the fact that I am dating, it is age appropriate, or if it stems from being the only one at preschool without a daddy. Perhaps it is a combination of all three. The one thing I am happy about is that when I asked her about her book tonight she said it was about her feelings. I told her that is a great way to express her feelings through writing. She liked that answer and I don't EVER want her to feel that she cannot discuss her feeling because I will understand just about everything or try to anyway. I guess it is time to pull out the development books and read up.

At times I do feel so guilty that I adopted without a daddy around but I do believe that we will survive and even if there was daddy, she would be feeling the same way about her dad in India.

It is almost the weekend.

Mary and kiran

Kiran

2006-02-21T20:25:00.000-06:00

Here is Kiran's new do. I bet she had three inches or more cut off. I am so in trouble with this child. She is the most strong willed kid I have ever known and one of the most beautiful and did I mention smart. That is going to prove to be an interesting combination in life. Lord help me get through this childhood.

Tonight, she was playing with my niece and they were playing house. I heard Kiran say, "Let's pretend it is my adoption day because that is the most special day." I hope when she is older she still feels the same way.

Tomorrow is Wednesday already!!!

Mary

President's Day

2006-02-20T17:17:00.000-06:00

Today we laid in bed snuggling and reading books. It was a wonderful way to start the day. Once we got up it was time to go and get a foil and cut. This is a new look for me. My hair is usually much shorter but in October I decided to let it grow out. So, my hairdresser decided this look would be great to let it grow out more. I love the color but not so sure about the look. Kiran has mixed reviews. My nephew asked me what I did to my hair and when the other look would be back. My 15 year old niece thought it was wonderful and finally I am leaving the 80s. Kiran also had about 2 inches taken off hers and she looks adorable. BTW-I took the picture myself....

That was the fun part of the day. I then needed to bring my car in to have new brakes put on. OUCH!! I killed a rotor, which will take a good portion of my tax refund, and they were having trouble finding one to fit. Why is it just when you think you have a handle on your finances something big comes up? So, I spent a good portion of my day hanging at my brother's waiting for the car to be done. At 3:40 they called and said it wouldn't be ready until tomorrow. Ok, how in the hell am I suppose to get to work tomorrow??? After I told them I would call them back because I might need them to put the old parts back on, my SIL and I came up with a plan that would work. As I was leaving their house in the mini-van they call me back and said they would have it done tonight. Why couldn't they have just done that in the first place. They found one a dealership and were on the over to pick up as he was speaking with me. I HATE CARS AND PROBLEMS WITH THEM!!

It was very nice having the day off though. I just love three day weekends. Why cannot they all be that way?

Happy President's Day!!

Mary

Roma

2006-02-19T08:18:00.000-06:00

In these two photos is a view of St Peter's Square from the view of Kiran in a stroller. When I had the film developed it really made me think that these tiny people, sitting in stollers really do have a different view of the world.

Two years ago we hopped on plane and went to Rome to meet friends from the internet. I had spoken with her on the phone once, chatted up a storm with her on the internet and their daughter was from the orphanage in Kolkata that Kiran is from, and they were crib mates, and it was so much fun to have them together. I have to admit that they also sent me a wonderful video of the orphanage that they took when they went to pick up their daughter. They focused many minutes of just Kiran for me.

We were treated like royality. We spent two nights in Tuscany, they took us to Florence, Pisa, and many wonderful restaurants. We drank wine everynight, talked families and politics, watched the kids play, went to mass with the "Poke". The memories are wonderful but next time I go back I want it to be an adult trip.

One of my favorite memories of the trip happened on the day Kiran took these photos. It was the day after we went to mass with Pope John Paul. In reality we only lasted about 45 minutes at mass when Kiran had enough. So, Dominick, took us into the Sistine Chapel. What an amazing place!! That is a future post....

The second morning we arrived at St Peter's, we were walking into the square when Kiran looked at me and asked, "We aren't going to see that Poke again are we? I really don't like him!" I guess she told me.... Saying this to her mother who has grown up catholic and for a long time thought it was the only religion...(That was when I was in grade school.)

Hope you enjoyed the little view of St Peter's Square from the eyes of a three and half year old.

The flowers.....

2006-02-15T20:14:00.000-06:00

The flowers, I had to bring them home tonight before the temperature hit zero or below. Today it was a balmy 16. I lost many but you can still see they are beautiful.....

I love that boy....(Man).....

Mary

PS...For those of you who don't really know me, it has been at least 10 years since some one has sent me flowers much less for Valentine's Day. I personally have never figured out why but I think I may be to independent for most MN men. Gill on the other hand is very cool with it all and understands me better then I think I do...

Random thoughts

2006-02-13T18:59:00.000-06:00

Last night, I was playing on the computer and Kiran was in the bathroom. She yells out, "Mommy, I am the only one in preschool who doesn't have a daddy." I told her that I knew that. She asked me how and I told her I looked at her list of kids in her room and all the parents' names are on there. I asked her if it bothered her and for the first time she said sort of. My heart almost broke. She then went on to tell me that one day at preschool one of the teacher's said that anyone who has a daddy please stand up. Of course, Kiran is the only one who is sitting down. She said that she felt bad that she didn't get to stand up. I am so pissed off. Why aren't people more sensitive. It is obvisious that she is the only brown child in class but then they had to make her look different in another way.... Am I justified in being mad???

Why did it take the Cheney's office over 24 hours to let the public know that he shot someone??? Just what were they trying to cover up?

I watched some of the funeral for Corretta Scott King on Saturday night and boy did I think that Daddy Bush was a little uncomfortable being the presences of so many people who don't really like is son....

I just love my new principal. She is wonderful, kind, caring, and totally the opposite of the jerk I use to work for.

Let me tell you guys about the best part of my day.... It was the end of the day, I still had my coat on from dismissing my students and was talking to the secretary with my back turned to the door. There were so many people in there and the noise level was high, that is when I heard my name. I turned around and saw that someone had delivered flowers and they were sitting on the counter. When someone said that they were for me. So I walked around some people and standing there was Gill. Not only did he get me flowers, he delivered them himself. My friends are having a great time with this, one of them made an annoucement on the intercom that I just got flowers and my boyfriend was still there. He didn't have the time to deliver tomorrow so he brought them today. I am more in love everyday......

Hope you all have a great week.....

M

My Dad

2006-02-11T19:16:00.000-06:00

This is my dad. He is the one responsible for my love of politics, teaching, and sports. He was born in 1938 on a cold October day in Tower, MN. He was the middle child of three with a sister older and younger. His loves today are his grandchild, children, gardening, fishing on Lake Vermilion, and keeping up with my brother's high school basketball team.

My father met my mom in the seventh grade and she couldn't stand him, he was always pulling her pigtails. It must of been love at first site. They started officially dating in tenth grade. The married the summer he graduated from the teacher's college in Duluth, which is now the University of MN, Duluth. On their honeymoon, he took her to Milwaukee to catch a Braves double header. My mom, tired and needing sleep, walked back to the car during the 3rd inning of the second game. My dad found her an hour after the game was over wondering around the parking lot still looking for the car. Milwaukee was the first big city my mom had ever been. It seems that their marriage started out on a great note they were married for 33 years and together for over 40.

They did love each other, raised 4 college educated good kids. He use to tell my mom how proud he was of his kids, whenever he run into someone, they always commented on what great adults his children where. My parents did their job right....

One year after my mom passed away, my dad started acting strangely. I would tell my brothers something wasn't right. Their answer was that he was just getting over mom's death. WRONG!!! It turned out that my dad is bipolar and from what the doctors tell us, my mom kept it under control. When he was down she would pick him up and so on... We are thankful daily that he found his new wife Norma about six years ago. Together they tend his garden in the summer, can his produce in the fall, and hang out in the cold winter months. BTW-He has planted his tomatoes for this coming spring already.

My first campaigns that I remember is McGovern VS Nixon and Jim Oberstar Vs. George Perpich. We have always been proud democrats and members of the DFL party. Paul Wellstone gave my dad credit for winning his first senate seat with a program my dad ran statewide, for middle and high school kids, to get people out to vote. The only time I was excused from school was to meet to Hubert Humphrey at the local union hall. He loved kids and came up with very creative projects for his students. One spring his Iron Range history class tapped the maple trees, made the syrup from the sap and sold it. One year he took 22 kids to Washington DC with the Close-up program and they raised every dime ($22,000) to go. Not to mention planting trees for the baseball team and coaching basketball.

We have all taken away his many loves into our families and those that we touch around. My dad is great!!

Have a great week all.....

What kind of Soul are You??

2006-02-09T18:31:00.000-06:00

I recently found this over at the Cozy Shack.... It seems to reveal many things about me that are true......

***You Are a Peacemaker Soul***

You strive to please others and compromise anyway you can.
War or conflict bothers you, and you would do anything to keep the peace.
You are a good mediator and a true negotiator.
Sometimes you do too much, trying so hard to make people happy.

While you keep the peace, you tend to be secretly judgmental.
You lose respect for people who don't like to both give and take.
On the flip side, you've got a great sense of humor and wit.
You're always diplomatic and able to give good advice.

Souls you are most compatible with: Warrior Soul, Hunter Soul and Visionary Soul

What Kind of Soul Are You?
http://www.blogthings.com/whatkindofsoulareyouquiz/

Outrage and life

2006-02-06T19:20:00.000-06:00

I was looking at the pictures on this link and am soooo angry.

http://djlphoto.com/lower9/l927.htm

These photos were taken of the lower 9th ward in New Orleans just a few weeks ago. At one time, my mom's sister and family lived in Chalmette. One would have to drive through the 9th ward to get to the French Quarter. It was a scary drive the first time but then I always found it such an interesting place. It is also the area that Fats Domino lived until the Katrina. BTW-My aunt passed away over 15 years ago and my uncle around 4. From what my cousins have learned is that the house they lived in was under 20 feet of water. Why the hell is the government sitting back at not cleaning this area up?????? Oh, could it be because the people who lived there were POOR!! In this country,k only money really speaks and that is so so so sad....

On a different note Kiran decided to change her name yesterday. She wants to be called Kiran Marlene BIBI .... and then our last name. Bibi is her birthmother's last name. I had a friend ask how I felt about that. I told her wonderful. Kiran understands the fact she has two moms and wants both of us to be a part of her. I only wish someday I could find her birthfamily for her......

I hope everyone had a great Monday....

M

Photo Sunday, again a little early...The Homecoming.....Inger asked so you shall receive.

2006-02-04T16:16:00.001-06:00

The day was August 10, 2001!!

The story begins with me deciding that I wasn't ready to take on a new country, pick up a child who was 8 1/2 months old, fly for 24 hours in air time back to MN, and then try to be a new mom. First mistake!!! Looking back I should have gone to India and picked up my baby by myself. My friend's mom, Joan, went into escorting for the agency I was using to bring Kiran home. She wanted to be the one to bring my baby to me. This woman lived in the same town my parents grew up in, knows all my relatives but through adoption we became friends. Not only that but she met Kiran 3 times before I did and brought home several special photos of my girl in the nursery. Guess what, the agency wouldn't let her go because they had a former employee who wanted her granddaughter to see India. Pissed me off big time and I yelled a lot. Her granddaughter was also escorting a baby to MPLS, she was only 17!! Our homecoming was delayed for 2 days because of that.

The morning of August 10, my dad and I left for the airport around 11:45 to wait for the 12:30 arrival of my daughter coming via Amsterdam on Northwest. Soon, I have around 30 people surrounding me anticipating the escorts and my daughter to walk through the international gate anytime. At 1:30 an employee with the airport comes down and tells us that all the people are through customs and there is no one left. OK, WHERE IS MY CHILD!!!

I proceed to a check in desk to ask someone what is going on and that my child was suppose to be on that plane. Due to privacy laws we cannot tell you that information. But IT IS MY CHILD!!! Sorry.

The first photo is me on the phone with the agency to find out if they knew anything. NOPE! My SIL finds someone who works for Northwest, tells him the situation and he comes through. Be back at the airport 7:30, they will be on a plane from Boston.

I am so damn mad but for some strange reason, I am the calmest one in the group. I start having thoughts that they were kidnapped or murdered in the streets of Kolkata or Delhi. I am relieved, a little when they tell me to be back at 7:30. We get back to my house, most of the people went home and won't be back for the next homecoming. My SIL gets on the computer and finds out that flight to MN is cancelled. I am a nervous wreck, where is my daughter, I have waited for this my entire life....... My cousin, calls a friend who works for Northwest, my adoption agency is working on it also but is having no luck tracking them down, she tells us that she has to make a few calls. In less then 15 minutes she calls me back with the seat assignment, flight number and all the details.

It is back to the airport at 6:30. Shortly after 6:40 an attendant from the customs office comes down to tell us that the two babies are almost done and should be out soon. I am about ready to jump out of my skin at that point. When she asked if anyone was waiting for a baby, I almost fainted....Our time had finally come.

The escort doesn't apologize she just says that she faxed the agency. Wait you had my home and cell phone number, why didn't you call ME! She didn't have an answer...... Anyway, my daughter made it home and was in my arms around 7:30. The other family is late getting there and by the time they arrive, the two escorts have taken their child to a hotel. They have no way of finding them. From what I understand it took them until 9:30 to track them down.

About a month later, I call Dillon and ask them to make sure that doesn't ever happen to another family again. They were so rude to me and then 9/11 happened and it didn't seem so important to fight with them anymore, my daughter was home and we were happy....

This story is becoming a great tale to tell Kiran. She doesn't really understand it at this point but some day we will laugh about it.

Until next time friends......

Photo Sunday a few hours early....January 29. 2001

2006-01-28T19:23:00.000-06:00

On this date my life changed forever......

Let me begin on November 19, 2000, in Minneapolis, MN. I was in the middle of getting my Master's from the St. Mary's University. Our classes met one weekend a month for two years. My class was preparing for our final project in March. It was a balmy Sunday afternoon, by MN standards, when I started gasping for breath, felt like I was going to throw up, and was pulling at the neck of my shirt. I was having my first panic attack. No idea why, but it happened. When I got home, I dialed my SIL, Denise, immediately. I told her that I thought my baby was born today. She asked why and I told her about the attack. Her reply, "Mark the day on the calendar and when your referral comes through, if her birthday is on this date, why bother having her photos checked out by the U of MN, we will know she is ours."

My reply, "We need to remember that Calcutta is 12 1/2 hours ahead of us so if the date comes through as November 20, it means the same thing." End of conversation.

Just a little 2 1/2 months later, I had just walked in from dismissing my students to their buses. It was raining cats and dogs with the forcast for the temps to go way below freezing..... There is a phone call for me in the office. It is my agency telling me that they have a referral for me. I told them the fax number and started waiting by the fax machine. It didn't long for the machine to start buzzing.... The first two lines, Name: Kiran Age: 20-11-2000. I started shaking, my body went numb, tears streaming down my face and I almost passed out. I knew she was mine before I even saw the 1X1 picture at the bottom of the page. I rushed to the phone, called Tammy from my agency back and told her that she was mine. Send me the official papers...... Back to my classroom to call my SIL and cousin, who is like my sister. My cousin, Kim, was so excited for me. My SIL was NO WHERE TO BE FOUND!! I left work with a permanent smile on my face. I decide to stop at Target and celebrate by buying perfect little child her first present from her MOMMY!!! (By the time she came home, the outfit was way to small. I still have it saved in her first year box, maybe her little girl will wear it someday.)

My SIL finally calls back, the roads are getting slippery, but I decide that I need to show her the information on her new niece. I drive the 8 miles, it takes more then 30 minutes, twice as long as usual. I walk in their house, show them the info. This is Lilianna Marlene... my brother stops me and says you cannot change this child's name. She deserves her given name. It makes sense, I like the name but don't change my mind at that time.

I drive home, 45 minutes this round, get to my driveway, cannot get up the little slope. Get some ice melt, put it on the driveway, go and get my car. On the way down the driveway, I slip and fall and slide right across the street on my bottom. Finally get in the house, look up the meaning of Kiran, in Hindi it means ray of light or sunlight. Cannot change, she becomes Kiran Marlene.

This was just the beginning of a life long love story, the child is mine and I am so at peace. It takes other 8 1/2 months before my little angel comes home, but this day started it all.......

Happy photo Sunday all........

Love,

Mary and Kiran

IT's Photo Sunday!!!

2006-01-22T08:07:00.000-06:00

I do believe that I am 17 or 18 in this photo. Standing next to me is my best bubby, Rita. We have had many good times together. We were getting ready to go and party with two of our friends.

The house in the background is the one I grew up in. It is a small three bedroom rambler with one, mind you one bathroom. My parents raised four kids in that house and I look at the homes we all have today and wonder how we all survived. Eventually they put a bathroom and shower down in the basement but life was still crappped.

My dad and his wife still live in that house today. It seems even smaller when you put just one extra family in there.

In Hoyt Lakes, most of the houses were like this one. The mine owned all the land and they built the houses. There were only 6 different flan plans to chose from and the big houses, with the upstairs, went to the administration. For many years, only people who worked in the mine where allowed to buy houses in town. Once they opened it up to everyone, my parents purchased this home. They moved in 1963.

Have a great day all!!

2006-01-19T19:09:00.000-06:00

Tagged!
By Alan that little shit!!!

Four jobs I've had:
1. My first job was working at the local pizza joint in Hoyt Lakes when I turned 16.
2. I worked as an usher at the Houston Astrodome, I met OJ and the wife, Joe Montana and many sports figures.
3. I still work a parttime job at a lawn, garden and pet supply store. If you have an animal, we can feed it even if it is a moose or zebra!!!
4. Of course, teaching in the inner city of Houston and Minneapolis.

Four places I've lived:
1. Hoyt Lakes, MN from birth to 19.
2. Duluth, MN That is where I went to college. The most beautiful town I lived in!! It looks over Lake Superior.
3. Houston, TX For three years while I taught for HISD. The most polluted city that I lived in .
4. My current address finds us in Apple Valley, MN.

Movies I'd watch again: (and again and again)
1. Toy Story By: Disney (it is my favorite).
2. Miracle, About the USA Hockey Team and Herb Brooks, who died about 3 months before the movie was released. I remember that day that they beat the Russian. Half the team was from MN.
3. Bride and Prejudice, an Indian film, I learned some of the culture in India through this movie.
4. Love Story

TV shows I love to watch:1.)
1. The Daily Show. I truly wished that Jon Stewart lived next door to me!! I won't kick him out of bed for eating crackers, much less anything else.
2. MN Twins Baseball
3. Larry King Live
4. Full House, It is Kiran's favorite show. Lord help me!!!

Four favorite foods:
1. Pizza
2. My Grandma's Mock Chicken Legs, she still fries them in lard, but damn they taste good!
3. My brother's filet mignon stuffed with his famous blue cheese sauce.
4. Wild Rice soup.

Four places I'd rather be right now:
1. Italy, I just loved it there.....
2. Lake Vermilion or Colorado, I love both of these places, equally.
3. Washington D.C. I just love the rat race.
4. Slovenia, it is where 4 of my great grandparents where born and would love to see it and visit some long lost cousins.

Four Bloggers I'd like to tag:
1. Blogzie
2. Sttropezbutler
3. Inger
4. Heidi

I would add five "Five Weird Things About Me":
1. I love the soap's. When I am home during the day they are on.
2. My first major in college was political science, but they didn't make enough money, so I became a teacher. HAHAHAHA!!!!
3. I flew off to Rome without ever meeting the people, except for the internet, I was staying with especially seeing I was traveling with my three old.
4. I like my Sister-in-law Denise better then my brother......... (Ok, I do like him but..)
5. It took my 41 years to tell a man, other then family members, that I loved him......
OK, they are not as exciting as Blogzie but my little life is rather BORING!!!!

Hope you enjoyed the life of a regular Minnesotan......

Mary

Update, Update

2006-01-16T20:12:00.000-06:00

This was a picture that a friend took the first night Gil and I met. She had it made into Christmas cards as a joke. Believe me, everyone that knows me is so damn excited for me. How much do you think I had to drink that night, one or five beers mixed in with two martinis??????

Gil is a very nice guy!! We see each other about once a week but daily, usually at least twice, we talk on the phone. He calls me every morning at 7:30 and I have come to look forward to those calls. What a great way to start my day out. It is basketball season and seeing he is an assistant coach, he is busy with that. His daughter is 8 and wants her mom and dad to get back together, like every 8 year old from a broken home. Gil does assure me that will never happen. He has met Kiran, only because he came to two of my brother's games and she was there with my SIL. Kiran was so cold to both of us the first game but on Saturday seemed a little more comfortable. I know it will take time with the girls and hopefully all will go well. We have talked about Kiran and I meeting his daughter. It makes me nervous to take that step but it has to be done at some point if we are to be together.

Did I mention that on two occasions he met Kiran, he also met my three brothers and dad?? Talk about stressful for me, I haven't brought anyone home since college. My dad liked him enough to invite him to our family Christmas but he had to decline because his team was playing that weekend. I was happy for that because I wasn't ready to take him home, not at that point.

After talking some the first week, we both realized that I worked with his mother for 5 years. What a small world!! She is a very kind, wonderful woman. I do believe that Gil takes after her. We just have so much in common, it is a little scary.

I haven't found anything that I don't like about him, yet.... He loves the fact that I can watch a football, basketball, or baseball game and he doesn't have to explain anything to me. One conversation went like this, if my team was playing your brother's and we were married, who would you stick up for. The answer, which I thought was a good one, I will yell for both teams!!! To tell you the truth he didn't like it but I told him old habits are hard to break and soon my nephew would be playing for his dad so my nephew wins.... He still insists that the moment he saw me he knew that we were going to be together forever. Time will tell....

At this point, I can truly say I am completely taken by him. I will even throw out the love word. We have great time when we are together and I have to say, some activities are better then others! The first week of January, he even took a day off to spend with me. It was so wonderful. No man has ever done that in my 41 years.

The one thing that troubles me is that it is so hard to find time to spend together without both of us having to make arrangements so far a head of time. We both understand but darn it, I wish we could be together 3 or 4 nights a week but in time, if it is meant to be, it will happen. He does want more kids but only if it works out. At this point, he knows I wouldn't want to birth one but would look into adopting again.

I will keep everyone updated, I am still pinching myself.

June 11, 1960

2006-01-15T00:19:00.000-06:00

My parents wedding photo. These are the six most important people who shaped me to me. My mom's parents, Frank and Vida, who you met a few weeks ago. My dad's parents are Ellen and Lawrence. I loved Grandma Ellen, she was the kindest, woman I never knew. She wanted everyone in her family just to be happy. She died about 2 1/2 months before Kiran came home. It wasn't less then a week before her death that she told someone, she was ready to die because she knew all of her grandchildren were finally happy, Mary was finally happy and she will never be alone again. Lawrence, on the other hand, the memories aren't the greatest, he loved his daughters and their families, but seemed to hate my dad and all of us. After all, my dad was just a teacher making $3,000 and he couldn't understand how they could have children. Not to mention, we were the grandchildren who saw them ever week, who went fishing with them, and were just there. He was an alcoholic until the last 15 years of his life. My mom grew to love him, I, however, never really did and I live with that guilt. Grandma loved us and we knew thatbut it was painful to hear that Matt is nothing because he doesn't make all the money the son-in-laws did. He was in fact the only Republican that was a blood relative.

My parents didn't have the perfect marriage but they survived over 40 years together. In the end, I remember being in the car with them and they were holding hands in the front seat. I almost threw up, your parents aren't suppose to act that way after 34 years of marriage and 10 years of dating. Looking back, I am so happy that I saw the love they shared after all the children left home. It was heartwarming.

Have a great week all, life is looking up!!!!

I hate to admit this, but I think I may be in love........

I'm tired and rambling

2006-01-11T18:13:00.000-06:00

I am so tired of playing the politics at work. It is making a new profession look better and better. The kids are fine it is the adults and powers that be that are this a difficult position. Our school, in the eyes of the state of MN and the Federal Government, isn't making adequate yearly progress. This means more staff development then I received in college. Some of it has been worth while but lately it all just sticks. Then it also means more damn paperwork so planning time for your classroom has to be done at home. Time taken away from our families. PLEASE PLEASE let them leave NCLB!!!!! Who in the hell ever tried to leave a child behind????

My principal has been placed on a medical leave of absences for the rest of the year. No one is saying what is wrong or even where he is. It leads one to suspect perhaps he is in treatment, which would be a good place for him. Even though I have been praying that he would get transferred, I never wanted anything like this to happen. We met our new principal yesterday and it was interesting to see those teachers who sucked up to the last guy start sucking up to the woman. One wonders what changes their will be once she makes it through the ton of paperwork sitting on Kevin's desk.

Today I received a Parents' Guide to Kindergarten for Kiran. It makes me sad to think my little chick is going into the big bad world next year. Then I get excited to watch her grow and learn. She gets so excited about preschool. I only hope the love for school lasts a lifetime.

On a positive note, I love high school basketball. My brother is a head coach for a private high school and has ran a fairly successful program for the last ten years. His team, the Cadets, were ranked 8 in the state yesterday. They played the number 1 team in the state and beat them.... It was fun to watch!!!

Enough of the ramblings....

Always the bridesmaid......

2006-01-08T18:23:00.000-06:00

Photo Sunday, I didn't forget. I have been having a hell of time getting this thing posted....

This is the first of 8 weddings I have been a member of the wedding party. What is the saying, always a bridesmaid never a bride. I was four and it was the first time I actually went to a beauty shop to have my hair done. I am the blondie with the "big hair". My cousin was the other flower girl. We are about 20 days a part in age and fought like sisters growing up. Today we are like sisters and the closest of friends. We still fight like sisters, especially over politics but we have come to an agreement that we cannot bring up the subject when we are together. The two boys on the ends are my two older brothers.

This was my aunt's first marriage. It ended in a divorce. To put it kindly, my aunt can be a
b-----. Her second husband is kind and wonderful. One wonders how some can find the mate of the dreams and others, like me, struggle to.

Sorry about the quality but the photo was my grandma's favorite and has been faded by the sun. The couple in back of us are my dad's parents. I always thought they looked so much older then my other grandparents and they were the same age.

Have a great week all. I am back to school tomorrow. JOY JOY!!!!!

DAMN, DAMN......

2006-01-03T12:27:00.000-06:00

Yesterday afternoon, I had a meeting with a financial counselor. The news is not what I wanted to hear but thought I might. With my credit card debt and the fact that I have overextended the value of my house, she told me the only way she sees my getting out of the situation is selling my house. At the moment, my house is more of a liability then an asset to me at this time. That means either trying to find a townhouse to rent or going into an apartment. It just makes me want to kick myself that all these years I have made poor decisions with finances and then being a single parent has put me over the edge. I sat in her office and just cried and cried. She was wonderful and told me to start self talking that it is ok and to let the past go and focus on the future. Why did it take me 41 years to figure this all out.

I know that Kiran and I will land on our feet and in six months life will be ok. She will hopefully learn mommy's lesson when she is older, but damn I am so embarrassed by the entire situation. Now I have to tell my family we will be moving into a rental unit somewhere and have to deal with their reactions. Tara, the counselor, asked me what the hardest part of this will be and I told her facing my brothers. She proceed to say it is none of their damn business why I am selling and not re-buying. Thank God she was wonderful and understanding. I have told my three closest friends and only cried when I told one today. Now I am sitting here in tears but it is part of the process.

Yes, we will miss our house but it is starting to fall apart anyway. It must still be the shock of it all. I must remember that I have wonderful friends, family and most of all Kiran.

Sorry for rambling.....

It's a New Year

2006-01-02T10:35:00.000-06:00

Well, 2006 has arrived, and it is looking like a fine year already. We spent New Year's Eve up on a small town in Northern MN with my dad and brothers' families. We had a wonderful time celebrating the end of 2005 and the beginning of 2006. It is always so much fun see Kiran hanging with all her cousins. Here is the gang of children we were with. They range from 15 to 4 months. Can you all spy Kiran???

I am off of school for another week and am looking forward to just resting, cleaning, and enjoying my time away from the students and the politics of my building. Maybe, I will even some extra for dating. The one thing that is difficult is arranging time to be together. Between our two daughters, his coaching, the holidays, and just life we don't seem to have many moments to be together. Hopefully with the holidays past us and things getting back to normal, I will see him more. We are talking at least twice daily and getting to know each other so that is a positive thing. If I didn't know better, I might think I was falling in l---.

It is freezing rain here in the big city of Minneapolis so we might just actually stay in our house and not leave it all day.....

Time for a good book, turning the fireplace on, and maybe even cooking a healthy meal.

Mary

Reflections of 2005

2005-12-28T13:01:00.000-06:00

I am sitting here reflecting back on this year. It has had it good and bad points just like every other year. With the beginning of the new year I see things are a changing already....

This year my daughter turned 5 and is starting kindergarten in the fall of 2006. My niece got her driver's permit, lord help all of those who drive the streets of Minneapolis. I turned 41, started taking anti anxiety medication after having the worst summer of my life and now I feel the best ever. My finances are a big mess but hopefully I can get that turned around in 2006 by winning the lottery!!!

Our country is one big mess. It is being run by people who don't give a damn about the public, education, and those who truly need help. They lie so easily and don't think twice about it. How can anyone live with themselves? They are out to make their pockets richer at the expense of everyone else. We are in a war that was started on a lie. People are dying daily for what??? Oil perhaps......

Next year at this time, I hope and pray that the election cycle coming up will see a change in Washington and make the powers that be answer the lies that they have told.

Happy New Year everyone..........

Adoption it is wonderful!!!

2005-12-27T00:23:00.000-06:00

This is an article I was interviewed for, it ran in the paper in August of this year. The day was actually my fourth anniversary with Kiran.... The comment that amazed me most was when a friend asked if I rubbed her skin won't she be lighter. Hell, I told him, I would love to look like that child.....

I hope you all enjoy....

Sense & SensitivityAdoptive parents love talking about their kids. But they're sometimes stunned, or stung, by questions they're asked.
Here's some guidance for the curious.
Sense & Sensitivity
By Bill Dawson
Star Tribune Staff Writer
Adoptive parents of foreign-born kids get these questions all the time;
"Is she your real daughter?"
"How will you teach him English?"
"How much did she cost?"
Kris Huson of Children's Home Society & Family Services in St. Paul calls these "the grocery store questions." Though usually well-intended, they can make an adoptive parent cringe.
Or laugh. "Does she cry in Korean?" is one of the bizarre questions asked of Kim Brown, adoptive mother of a 2-year-old daughter.
"I always thought babies cried in a universal language," says Brown, who lives in Crow's Landing, Calif.
My wife, Ila, and I, who adopted a baby girl named Sonali from India, are constantly amused at what people say.
Ila, who is of Indian descent, had a co-worker tell her, "It's so amazing you were able to get such a beautiful child from such a poor country."
Hmm.
Mary of Apple Valley got a similar jolt after she decided to adopt a child from Calcutta. Her aunt asked, "Oh, are you going to India to adopt because they're so smart in math?"
Kristin Vonnegut's mother asked, "Are you going to become Buddhist?" after Vonnegut decided to adopt from India.
"Which is funny," says Vonnegut of Avon, Minnesota.,"because most Indians aren't Buddhist."
Vonnegut's father-in-law wondered why she wasn't adopting from Mexico, where "they're so much more docile."
Speak to me
Ila and I also have discovered that curiosity around language abounds when you adopt a child, even a non-speaking infant.
"Is she learning English?" is a popular question. Mary, a teacher, was surprised to hear this from a colleague.
"My school is half ELL (English Language Learners), so, excuse me?" says Mary. She adopted Kiran, now 4, when the child was 8 months old.
Kristi Jenkins of Marion, Ill., will soon be united with a 20-month-old boy from Mumbai, formerly Bombay. She's also mom to two stepchildren and one biological child. Her stock answer for those who wonder how she'll be able to communicate with her newest child?
"I tell them, we didn't understand our biological daughter when she spoke to us in English at 20 months," Jenkins says.
Harsher words
Not all comments are so amusing.
Before her baby joined her, Mary was asked if her little girl would be "dots or feathers." Mary was baffled until the questioner explained that dots meant dots on the forehead -India-born -and feathers meant feathers in the hair - American Indian.
She's also heard, "Thank God she's here and growing up a Christian," and, from an elderly man in Hoyt Lakes, Minn.: "If you rub her skin, will that make her lighter?"
Others stand out:
"Does that dot on his forehead scratch off?"
"I couldn't bring a person like that into my home."
"Aren't you afraid people will think he's Middle Eastern?"
The last came from a co-worker who said, "People will think he's a terrorist," prompting Jenkins to ask, "How can a 20-month-old be a terrorist?"
Jenkins blames some of this on where she lives in Illinois. "I think I'm kind of in redneck land here, and I think there still is a lot of racism."
But similar comments are heard in Minnesota, which has the nation's highest rate of foreign adoptions per capita.
Ask Becky Steeber, who works at Children's Home Society and is an adoptive mother of three. A physician tending to one of Steeber's adopted boys, who has spina bifida, asked, "Do they the adoption agency have any healthy white kids?"
"One of most appalling comments I ever got," Steeber says.
What's worse, Mary said, is that often, "they'll ask these questions right in front of the child. It really amazes me how people can be so unsmart. I really want to say stupid."
Brown sees this as a growing challenge now that her daughter is getting old enough to understand what is being said about her.
"I have to think how Natalie is going to think about these questions," says Brown. "I don't want her saying, `Are you my real mother?' `Do you love me as much as your other kids?'-"
Cautious questions
So what is the right thing to ask? First, know that adoptive parents aren't hypersensitive souls who parse every statement, looking for something offensive. We love talking about our kids. And we understand that most people aren't trying to be insensitive; they just don't know how, or sometimes what, to ask.
Still, when addressing an adoptive parent, you might want to rethink the following questions:
"How much did he cost?"
What you probably mean is, "How much did the adoption process cost?" That varies, with much of the cost going to administrative fees. "It's not just paying someone off and taking a child across the world," Brown says. Some parents find this an intrusive
question, others are happy to answer, but none of us likes to think of our kids as having price tags on their foreheads.
"What happened to her real mom?"
We know you mean "birth" or "biological" mom, but it's still a sore semantic subject. Adoptive parents are real parents and some can get really touchy about this. Try to use the b-words, birth or biological, and we'll try to understand when you forget.
"Why did you adopt overseas when there are so many children here?"
Multiple reasons. One is the domestic adoption laws that give U.S. birth mothers time to change their mind and reclaim the child. Bonding with a child, and then losing him or her to the birth mother, is heartbreaking, especially for couples who adopt because of infertility. This seldom happens with foreign adoptions.
"Why was he put up for adoption?"
A fair question, but don't be offended if we decline to answer. Many parents consider the details private, and want the child, when he or she is old enough to understand, to know this information
before others do.
"Do you get to go to an orphanage and pick one out?"
No, it's not like choosing a puppy at a kennel. Usually, the prospective parents submit a preference for a boy or girl, a range of ages, and whether they'd be willing to take on a "special needs" child, which is usually a youngster with a disability or health concern. The agency or service eventually sends them the picture and profile of a possible "match," which parents can accept or refuse. If they refuse, they'll get another match, until they finally find the right child for them.
"Isn't she lucky, being raised by loving parents in the U.S.?"
Sure, but it works both ways. Adoptive parents feel immensely lucky and blessed themselves. Even non-religious couples often feel that Providence has stepped in and given them the perfect child.
.
Bill Dawson is at wdawson@startribune.com.
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©2005 Children's Home Society & Family Services

CHristmas morning....

2005-12-25T18:41:00.000-06:00

These are my three favorite photos of the day. They were taken this morning when Kiran discovered what Santa brought her. The first photo is of the gifts... Yes, Santa should really only bring one gift to our house but this year he brought two. The first is the first season of Full House, I am already sick of it, and four books in the Junie B series which I love and so does Kiran. She also opened an adoption bracelet that her mommy got for her. She told me it was the most important bracelet she had!!!!
We had a great day, first over to my brother's to open presents with them. Kiran, amazingly, found money to buy her mommy some new prefume. I was also amazed at that my brothers family got my a Gift Certificate to the MN Children's Theater. I can bring Kiran to at least two plays in the next year. I am so excited.....

Then it was off to my aunt and uncles for an early dinner. Always fun to go over there. I love them so much and in the last 13 years my aunt as made sure I am never alone for any holiday. Then back to my brothers for some wine, playing a few games, and watching that classic basketball movie Space Jam.

I hope everyone spent today the way that they wanted to..... I love my family but happy to be home........

Merry Christmas everyone!!!!

Mary

HAPPY HOLIDAYS

2005-12-22T09:24:00.000-06:00

I just wanted to stop in and tell everyone that I hope they have a wonderful holiday season. It has been fun getting to know my cyber bloggers....

It seems that Santa struck again. This time it was a friend from California, who stayed at my house last year. I met her through adoption and the interent also. Last night, there was a package sitting in front of our door addressed to Kiran. Inside it was full of goodies for my baby. Let's see an ornament of a San Fransico street car, a t-shirt, a beautiful tea set from Chinatown, and some other things. WOW!! We are so lucky to have so many terrific friends.

It seems my Christmas wishes are the same as last year, world peace, a new president, and maybe a daddy for Kiran. Sure hope something happens in 2006 to move us toward all three of these goals. Kiran, on the other hand, has asked for a game, a Full House video, and Junie B Jones books. Not to bad for this Santa.

Have a great weekend!!!!

Love to all,

Mary

Christmas Program

2005-12-19T13:20:00.000-06:00

Here is Kiran on the way to her preschool Christmas program. After a little coaxing she finally decided it would be ok to actually go to school and perform. I took the day off to be Kiran's mom. It was so much fun. They sang 6 songs and were so adorable. The top picture is a little dark but one of my favorites. FYI, that is an advent wreath on top of their heads.

As you can see, the class is somewhat, how do it say it, Euro American.... Kiran and I had an interesting conversation last week that I didn't think anything about until this morning. It went like this..."Mommy, do you know that I am the only one in my class with brown skin."

"Yes, sweetie, I thought you might be. Does that bother you?"

"No, mommy, I am the lucky one because it is such a beautiful color."

"You are right about that pumpkin."

No big deal, then a mother asked me where Kiran was from and I told her India. She then went on to say that her son asked if any brown people were Americans or born in America. I almost fell over that some 5 year old would not realize that there are brown people in Minnesota born and raised. He asked that because Kiran had told him that she was American even though she was born somewhere else and he didn't believe her. I just hope that she stood her ground and didn't give in......

The presents are wrapped, the cards are mailed, and it is time to just sit back and enjoy the birth of Christ. Kiran wants to have birthday cake for baby Jesus on Christmas day.